


A Synonym for Acting

by Angelicskye



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Asexual Character, BAMF Castiel, Blow Jobs, Bottom Dean, Childhood Trauma, Cock Warming, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub, Dom/sub Undertones, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Eventual Smut, Explicit Language, F/F, F/M, Hand Feeding, Healthy Relationships, Homophobia, Hurt Sam Winchester, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Internalized Homophobia, Kidnapped Sam, Kidnapping, M/M, Multiple Orgasms, Non-Consensual Somnophilia, Oral Fixation, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Past Drug Use, Praise Kink, Protective Castiel, Protective Dean Winchester, Psychological Trauma, Safe Sane and Consensual, Sub Dean, Teasing, Top Castiel, Trans Character, Transphobia, dom Cas, no romanticized non-con
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-19
Updated: 2015-07-30
Packaged: 2018-03-02 05:22:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 16
Words: 27,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2801096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angelicskye/pseuds/Angelicskye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester, small town mechanic, trying his best to look out for his little brother who always finds himself in trouble, trying his best to hold everyone's head above the water his whole goddamn life. Then this asshole actor comes into his life and turn it upside down...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> First fic! Please enjoy =]

Dean wonders briefly how much of the Jack Daniels is left. The shop has been unusually busy and all Dean wants to do is drink himself into a deep sleep and forget the week ever happened. Unfortunately, Bobby has been having a rough time too and drank all the damn liquor in the house.

A year ago, Bobby and Ellen had a “one-nighter.” This “one- nighter” turned into another “one- nighter” and then another one, until there were so many that it was essentially a relationship. Thing is, it was some major secret. Bobby was nauseatingly cheerful and Dean got queasy just by being in the same room as the guy. He knew something was up, but would’ve never guessed it. It wasn’t until about three months ago that the two of them decided to announce their relationship. Dean was ecstatic. Bobby was Dean’s second, less abusive father and Ellen pretty much jumped into the role as his mom when he came first came to Spellhaven when he was twelve. It seemed like the natural order of things. Jo, unfortunately, was not happy. At all. She detested their love, despite the fact that her father was barely around when she grew up, was a first class asshole, and ditch his family five years ago. She still had this major part of her that was in denial and wanted her parents to be happy and together. She knew that her feelings were selfish and unrealistic. That’s why she tried her best to hide her animosity, but it was too much for the girl. Dean always thought the phrase “she exploded” was a stupid exaggeration. You can’t compare a person’s temper to a bomb, that’s stupid; or so he thought until Jo, for lack of a better word, exploded. There literally isn’t any other way to describe the event other than a massive explosion occurred, leaving shrapnel lodged in the hearts of all those involved, that being Bobby, Ellen, and the bomb herself. That was a week ago and since Jo is Ellen’s first priority, she picked her daughter’s wellbeing over Bobby (something that Bobby completely understands and agrees with). The two of them left for some much needed mother and daughter bonding time. Ellen promised Bobby that when she’d return, they’d talk things through, but the future looked very bleak on the horizon.

That is why Bobby has been in a drunken coma for the entire week and how Dean had found himself as the impromptu manager of the auto repair shop. Dean Winchester was a mechanic. Not an accountant. Not a cashier. And especially not a fucking manager! Not to mention the fact that a third of their staff was on holiday break in different parts of the country and for some god awful reason, for the first time in the history of the holiday season in Spellhaven, they were actually busy. In short, Dean was done. Not just done, but DONE. He gave everyone the weekend off and elected to stay close on Saturday and Sunday because boy did he need it and the only person to tell him “no” was knocked out on a whiskey-saturated sofa. He wanted to finish up all the cars they had to work on before the day was over. He works vigorously on the car in front of him. If he had the luxury to take his time on it he would because it was one hell of a car, the Lamborghini Aventador. She was a real beauty. As Dean finished and closed the hood, it literally takes all his will power not to stroke it or even kiss it because damn! He of course has a soft spot for his baby, but this piece of art was just that… art.

“Should I give you two a moment?” a deep gravelly voice startles Dean from his reverie.

“What?” he turns toward the stranger, feeling like he just got caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

Brilliant eyes greet him and he feels like he’s been smacked in the face with their sheer blueness. They dance with a light of amusement and curiosity as they study him, seemingly peering into his soul. The owner of those eyes wore black slacks and a black shirt, only to be offset a coal grey jacket. He wore sunglasses on his collar that looked very expensive and there was a smirk plastered on his face that showed how amused he was by Dean’s predicament. Dean immediately labels him as a dick; a handsome blue-eyed dick, but a dick nonetheless.  “You and the car, I was expecting you to make out with it.”

Dean averts his gaze to ground and starts to walk around the stranger to cash register, “Sorry, sir, I’ll ring you up.”

“You don’t have to apologize. I think I would’ve enjoyed seeing your tongue on my car. What a sight you’d make.”

With that statement in the air, Dean stops dead in his tracks. He face turning an impressive red. Did this customer really just say what he thought he said? He couldn’t have. Dean is just tired. When he peeks over his shoulder, the man he is wearing the biggest shit eating grin, like he’s so fucking pleased with himself and he can’t believe that this sonofabitch would even- No… Dean has to calm down. Throwing punches at paying customers does not do well for business. He scurries inside to ring up the little fucker- no… customer.

“Cash or credit?” he says tightly through a forced smile.

“Credit is fine.” The man seems totally at ease, curse him.

“I need some identification please,” he busies himself with the whole checking out process while pointedly avoiding looking in the asshole’s face. His name was Castiel Novak. A shit name for a shit person, Dean thought. When everything is taken care of he gives the man back his possessions and the key to the car and makes a beeline to his next task.

“Do you want to take her for a spin?”

Dean whirls around so fast he might’ve given himself whiplash, “W-what?”

“You. Drive. Car. Yes?” Castiel asks, speaking mockingly slow.

Dean knows that this man is trying to demean his intelligence, but driving a car like this is a once in a lifetime thing and his intellect can be mocked all night long for all he cared. Forget about his work too. Dean doesn’t mind saving a few cars overnights and finishing them up in the morning, not if it means he can drive douchpants’ Lamborghini. He nods swiftly, his mouth still gaping in surprise from the unexpected offer. He takes a few cautious steps toward the car, never taking his eyes off Castiel, fully expecting the man to laugh at him, jump in his car, and drive away leaving him in the dust, but instead the man tosses him the keys and climbs in the passenger seat. Dean’s face splits into a broad grin. Fuck yeah! He runs/ skips into the drivers seat, anticipation bubbling in his gut.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel looks over at the man besides him. He was gorgeous and magnetic. His zeal for the car warmed him in more ways than one. The green-eyed mechanic hastily starts the car and begins to drive onto the main road. Oh yeah, Cas thought, this is going to be fun….


	2. Evening Car Ride

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soo... I won't be able to post the next chapter until I get back from winter break! Hopefully things work out.
> 
> Btw... if you are very sensitive about people taking offense of sexuality preference, then tread with caution. Anything negative toward gay, bi, lesbian, pansexual, asexual, etc. preferences are not my personal view, it's the character. Please note that the reason I give certain characters certain views is because we live in a world where people have these views and a goal for me in the story is also for the character to be corrected in their wrong thinking and become correctly informed.

Dean could almost forget he wasn’t alone. Almost. His neck tingled lightly as his hairs stood up. It was that reaction you get when you feel somebody is staring at you.

“So… um… Cas, what do you do for a living?” he says trying to break the awkward silence.

“I’m an actor. We’re filming a movie in the area.”

Now that explains a lot. There were so many people cramped into the little town of Spellhaven and a certain excited undertone in the people. Dean just ignored it because he doesn’t care about stuff like that. He had heard about a movie, but he thought it wouldn’t start filming in a couple of months and that it was going to be some shitty B movie that nobody cared about.

“What’s the movie about?” he was pretty curious at this point and still wanted to fill the awkwardness with chatter.

“I’m surprised you haven’t heard about it. It’s called ‘Dead Weight’.”

“Telling me the title doesn’t really give me the story, Cas.”

A smirk plays on Castiel’s lips, “It’s about three people, an asexual woman who is stuck in an abusive marriage, a closet bisexual man from a powerful conservative family, and a witty pansexual who is absolutely charming on the outside yet struggles with depression. The three of them find love and struggle to overcome life. It’s a story about love, loss, sorrow, triumph, and equality.”

Dean tries to contain his laughter, he really does, but it just spills out of him like vomit. He can’t stop or hold it in. His eyes are filling with tears and his body is shaking. He feels Castiel’s strong grasp on the steering wheel holding it steady.

“I don’t understand. Where’s the humor in what I said?” Dean looks at Cas and for the first time the man looks something other than amused. He looks utterly bewildered. His blue eyes searching Dean’s green ones as if they can find the joke and that cuts Dean’s laughter short. Did he really not realize the ridiculousness he just spouted?

“Sorry, but dude… come on… what’s the movie really about?”

“I just told you.”

“But seriously man! You can’t expect me to believe that the shit. That’d be the crappiest movie ever! Sounds like some stupid porno…” Then Dean thought, maybe it was a porno considering the good looking guy sitting next to him, “Is it a porno?”

Cas gave him an assessing look. Dean felt like he was being picked apart and examined from the inside out. Although the actor’s humor and smugness made him seem like a jerk and Dean resented it, he is actually missing that light hearted teasing manner. Now he felt… judged.

“What?!” he snapped at the blue-eyed man.

“I didn’t take you for a close-minded simpleton. I guess since this is a small town I shouldn’t be surprised,” and with that sentiment the man turned his gaze away from Dean and out the window. Dean felt like he was being dismissed, no… he was being dismissed! Was he suppose to leave or something? He can’t just step out of the car. It was flying down the empty road at close to a hundred miles an hour and that would hurt like a bitch. He felt guilty for offending Cas, but really… a story about a three-person couple? Two guys and a girl? Sounded like a sweet deal for the lady, but she’s asexual and doesn’t like sex? That’s ridiculous! Does that mean the two guys… do “it”? That’s gross! And what the hell is a pansexual?! Does the freak get turned on by kitchen pans or something? This had to be either a joke or a porno.

“Listen, dude… I didn’t mean to offend you, but the movie sounds a little out there. I mean how can three people be in a committed relationship? Isn’t that just code for a three-way? And does the pansexual  masturbate to frying pans or something?”

Cas tries to stay indifferent and stare out the window, but he’s laughing the same tear-jerking belly laughter Dean was doing not so long ago. He faces Dean to say something and laughs some more. At this point, Dean face is burning from embarrassment. He can’t believe that he’s being made fun of. He wasn’t the one to say stupid stuff. Cas wipes a tear and looks fondly at him. Dean somehow grows more red.

“So maybe you’re not a close-minded simpleton… you’re just misinformed. Ignorant.”

“Hey! I ain’t ignorant-”

“Shh…” Cas gently touches Dean lips, “Stop talking. Ignorance can be rectified. There is no shame in it. Now, before we continue our conversation, tell me your name. You’ve already learned mine and devised an adorable little nickname for me in the short time I’ve known you.”

Cas’ fingers lingered on Dean’s lips for a second longer. He felt his pulse speed up and his breath quicken. “Dean… Dean Winchester,” he said a little to breathy for his taste.

“Dean. Dean Winchester. Winchester Dean. Deano. Dee…”

“Having fun there?”

“Why yes I am Dean. I’m finding it hard to concoct a nickname for you. Anyway, where was I?”

“You were going to cure me of my ignorance or some crap like that.”

“That’s right. A triad relationship is a romantic and/ or sexual relationship between three people. In the case of the movie, which is definitely not a porno, they are all in a romantic relationship. Their love for one another is very much real, Dean. Some people can have more than one soul mate. And no, a pansexual does not insinuate a sexual attraction to cookware, but someone who is attracted to anyone regardless of gender identity, I guess that there can be a pansexual individual who enjoys a good saucepan in the bedroom,” he says with a smile on his face, but his eyes are closely gauging Dean’s reaction to the information.

“So the sex stuff is… between the two guys? Only?”

“Of course, the woman is asexual.”

“What role do you have in all this?”

“I am the pansexual.”

“So… does that mean you… um… do… stuff with um-”

“If you’re asking if I have to do sexual things with a man, Dean, then yes, that is my role in this movie.”

Dean’s thoughts stuttered. He was in the car sitting next to a man who did gay stuff. John Winchester must be churning in his grave right now. Dean was never allowed to hang out with “that crowd” and now that his father’s gone it still felt wrong. It’s mainly because dear old dad made sure to engrave his ideals and views into him and they were enforced with pain. He tensed up in his seat. He wasn’t able to enjoy his ride in this wonderful car and Cas’ admission made it even worse.

“Dean, you seem conflicted. Is there something troubling you?”

“You can’t just drop a bomb like that and expect everything to be all hunky dory!”

“It’s just a movie, Dean.”

“But how can you do that? Doesn’t that gross you out?”

“Not really. I’m an actor and it’s just acting. Plus, I’m bisexual anyway and my fellow co-star isn’t bad looking.”

There goes another fucking bomb. It was like WW2 or something in the car. Cas was bi… The dude was gay for dudes and how in the world is Dean suppose to handle that?! And how in the world was he supposed to feel comfortable sitting next to the guy? He jumps as two hands gently touch his shoulders.

“I need you to calm down, Dean. I’d rather not get in an accident. Make a U-turn when possible.”

Fuck. He completely forgot he was driving this guy’s car. His mind went on autopilot as he was having a mini panic attack. The firm hands started massaging his shoulders. He relaxed in their grip, all the tension and worry draining away. He almost forgot to make the U-turn, but turned them down the other direction.

“That’s it… just relax. Drive until you see Grace Bridge, then turn unto it.”

The fingers digging into his back were heavenly. He fought to hold back a moan of appreciation. He relaxed even more so, his muscles felt like jelly and a warm buzz filled his body. It was hard to think about anything stressful or anything at all but the sensation Cas was giving him. Cas was also murmuring little encouragements like ‘Good boy’ ‘that’s it’ and ‘you’re doing great’ beside him. He was way too close in Dean’s opinion, but he was pleasantly distracted. He turned on the bridge as instructed.

“Good. Now make a left on Mitchell Hammock Dr. and right on Marimount lane.”

When Cas finally told him to stop the car, they were at Spellhaven’s nicest hotel, which wasn’t saying much. It was a four star family run place. It was really nice, but he was sure that a big shot like Cas probably has seen much better. Cas smiled at him and stepped out of the car. Dean wanted to whine when he felt the hands leave his shoulder blades.

“Thank you very much for the repair on my car and your company. It was enlightening. Please bring my car back around tomorrow at noon. Don’t dent her or scratch her up.”

Cas patted the car as if saying “Off you go!” and Dean did go with a lazy smile on his face. It wasn’t until he was on the bridge on the way back to Bobby’s did he realize what just happened. The fucker touched Dean, massaged him! The dude liked guys and he was rubbing all up on Dean. Not only that, but he was praising Dean the whole time like he was a trained pet. Dean should have told him to fuck off, but instead he relaxed into his hands. His dad told him not to hang out with people like Castiel Novak because he might “catch the gay.” He thought his dad was a nutcase at the time but did Cas’ presence actually affect him. It had to. There was no other explanation for what happened and-

Wait a second… did he just gave Dean the car and told him to bring it around at noon? Dean abruptly stops the car on the side of the bridge and turned toward the direction Castiel was in. Despite the cars passing him by and the eyes of the people looking at him like he was a madman (which he probably was at the moment), Dean yelled at the top of his lungs at the man he’d knew wouldn’t hear him from this distance, “I’M A MECHANIC!!!!! NOT A GODDAMN CHAUFFEUR!!!!!!!” He got in the vehicle and continued the drive to Bobby’s grumbling his dissent.

_What a fucking asshole…_

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cas watched as the Lamborghini drove down the road. When he could no longer see it he broke down in hysterical laughter. He can’t believe that the man, Dean Winchester, who obviously had some homophobic viewpoints, just melted under his fingers and obliviously took the role as his temporary chauffeur with a smile on his face. Cas knew he was good, but he is even surprised by himself at how well that went. But he knew it wasn’t all him, it was Dean too. As he walked into the hotel he reflected on what he gathered from the green-eyed man. One, that he had very black and white views when it came to sexuality (most likely enforce by parent or family member). Two, that there was a slim chance of Dean being as straight as he thought he was. Three, that the man was a sub. Cas smiled as he went over the car ride again in his head. He wanted to take things further, but with the vehement opinion that Dean seemed to have of male on male sex, he’d have to take things slower. He originally thought by the way Dean reacted at the shop would make him an easy target, but the fear (not hatred) in his eyes at the concept of something other than heterosexuality suggested very deep ideals ingrained in him. As he finally got to his room he took out his cell phone to call his assistant.

“Hello Tina.”

“Mr. Novak, how may I help you?” the twenty year old’s voice chirped from the phone.

“I need a stress-reliever. Who’s available?”

“Cynthia is, sir. She was asking about you earlier today.”

“Ah… she’s a very good girl. Have her come to my room as soon as she can.”

He hung up the phone and went to setting up the scene. This is just the thing he needs after a day of shooting.


	3. Can you believe this fucker?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... next chapter! Yay! Hopefully you guys like it. I'm still trying to get in my stride with this story. Enjoy =)

Dean sat in the living room staring at the clock. He was suppose to relax the day away, drink till he felt numb, do something nice for his day off, but instead all he could think about was that fucker… The guy had some nerve, asking Dean to drop him off at his hotel and dismissing him as if he was the help. He sat in the living room staring at the clock. He’s been sitting there for a good 45 minutes or so, just watching the clock and hearing the piercing ticking noise accompanied by Bobby’s snoring in the background. When Dean got back yesterday, instead of vegging out like he planned he had to work off his frustration and managed finishing all the repairs of the cars he wanted to save till the morning, but when he woke up (at the ungodly hour of 5am because he couldn’t sleep properly) he had nothing to do. He managed to make meals for a few days to come, clean all the bathrooms in the house, and sweep/ mop the floor. He was tempted to grab his riffle and do a couple of tosses, but he was already feeling a bit unmanly and didn’t need his father’s voice in his ear about colorguard being a pansy ass sport. So when he was done he sat. Sat and watched the clock. The stupid fucking clock that couldn’t move fast enough.

The chorus of _Carry On My Wayward Son_ fills the room. Dean fishes his phone out of his pocket. “Caller blocked? I hate it when Sammy does this,” he rolled his eyes and answered the call “Sam… what the hell trouble you in now, man?”

“Sam? Is that the name of your secret lover, Dean Winchester?” the voice said.

Dean had the sudden urge to throw his phone at the wall. He really couldn’t believe that this little prick was calling him. How the hell did he even get his number anyway?!

“Cas… I swear when I see you I am going to-”

“I’m desire to leave early. Be here at 11:30.” Call ended.

Dean stared at his phone incredulously. Did he really expect Dean to just drop everything and pick him up because he felt like leaving early? Granted, Dean wasn’t doing anything at the moment, but he could’ve been! Cas expected Dean to jump when he said jump and it ticked him off. He looked at the clock. 11:07. Dean knew just what to do. He was going to sit there and watch the clock. Watch it turn 11:30. Watch as it ticked pass noon. Just watch the clock until Castiel realized Dean wasn’t coming and calls his own ass a taxi to bring him to come pick up his own damn car. This was not a game Dean was going to play. Not for some gay jerky actor from Hollywood who thought he was a big shot. He sat and waited as the clock turned 11:15. The hotel was about 15 minutes away if he wasn’t driving like a granny. He would have to leave now in order to get there in time, but instead he stayed seated.

11:22. He watched the second hand go around approaching the minute marker. If he left he would be late by a few minutes, but late is late. Good thing Dean wasn’t going to leave at all. Good thing Dean was going to make that prick sweat and be late to whatever weird thing him and his actor buddies had to do today. Good thing- 11:23. “Fuck!” Dean hissed as his resolve broke. He ran to grab his jacket, the car keys, and fled out the door. He was going to be late.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel stepped out of the hotel doors as soon as the clock indicated that it was 11:30. To his utter surprise, Dean wasn’t there. He frowned. Had he push the man too far? Did he misjudge him? Perhaps he should’ve taken it slower. He thought, no, expected to see Dean arrive early. To see him begrudgingly waiting for Castiel to step out of the hotel doors for a couple of minutes. That was the purpose of him finding the perfect seat in the lobby to view the street.

11:33. Cas stood in the same spot where Dean dropped him off before. He wasn’t one to wait and was getting impatient being use to people jumping when he said jump. He thought about his interaction with Dean. It seemed blatantly obvious how submissive he was. He was snapped out of his reverie by the sound of tires squeaking on the pavement. He followed the source of the sound with his eyes to see his car barreling down the road, going at a very unsafe speed for such a public area. It warmed his heart to see how quickly Dean tried to obey his command. As the car stopped in front of him, Castiel had put on his mask. Although he was very pleased that he wasn’t wrong, he couldn’t greet the man cheerfully or cordially. He had to make his displeasure for disobedience known.

“Cas-”

“You’re late.”

“I- um…” Dean flushed, clearly embarrassed. “I’m sorry about that. Where to?”

Castiel took a moment to scrutinize the man. He stared into those vividly green eyes, at the twitch in his cheek, the nervous pull of his lips, the fidgeting of his finger on the steering wheel, and his posture as if he was deflated. The man was uncomfortable. Good. Cas made sure to keep his voice flat and devoid of emotion, “I am meeting my cast mates for lunch. The diner on Windigo Trail.” He averted his eyes away from the driver and looked out the window.

Castiel knew that Dean should be throwing his bitch fit now. So he waited for it to come. He heard the anger in his voice when he called him earlier. He could sense it now, feeling the waves of nervous and frustrated energy rolling off of him. Any second now…

“Fuck this!” Dean veered of the rode and parked in an empty lot.

“Dean, I’m already late. We don’t have time for this.”

“Well, you’re going to make time! Do you know what you are, Cas? You’re an asshole. You can’t just treat us ‘little people’ like toys for your amusement. I don’t know you. You don’t know me. I was just the unlucky sonofabitch that had to work on your car. That’s it. So, I brought your car, now this whole thing is over. Have fun filming your weird ass movie. Happy fucking holidays!!!” Dean got out of the car and walked away. Castiel smiled. This was going better than planned. Waiting a beat, he got out of the passenger side and sat in the driver’s seat. He drove the car leisurely to where Dean was walking a grumbling on the sidewalk.

“Get the fuck away from me, Cas. You’re ‘late’, remember?” he said in a mocking tone.

“Stop.”

Dean stopped walking and faced him. “What?”

“Get in. I’ll take you home.”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Did this fucker really think Dean was going to get in the car with him? Idiot. He went back to walking down the road. He tried to ignore Castiel the best he could. He already embarrassed himself enough for a day, thank you very much. He’s was suppose to stay home and let Cas stew, but instead he hopped in the car like a trained monkey and broke multiple road laws just to get to the man. On top of that, he was supposed to give him a piece of his mind as soon as he picked Castiel up, but no. He took orders and kept his mouth shut. Momentarily regressing back to daddy’s little soldier. He hated it. Now, that he finally built up the willpower to tell him to fuck off, he wasn’t going to get in that car again. He wasn’t going to sit next to Cas again. He flashed back to the day before, how good it was to hear Cas call him a “good boy” when he relaxed for him. How good it felt to have Cas direct him, how even though Dean’s hand were on the wheel it was as if Cas was driving. He shivered.

“Dean. You’re obviously cold. Get in the car.”

No… Dean couldn’t. Didn’t want to risk catching ‘the gay’. It sounded ridiculous, but the actor did something to him and he couldn’t deny it. The sound of car horns sounded behind him. Since Cas was driving the same speed as Dean was walking, cars started lining up behind him. Dean looked at the blue-eyed man who didn’t give any sign of being affected by the horns and profanities coming from behind him. Dean cursed the one lane streets in his small little town. He could just ignore the people and Cas, but he was feeling more and more responsible by the second for causing the unnecessary traffic. “Shit…” he groaned as he climbed into the passenger seat.

“Tell me, Dean. Where do you live?” the car was now flying down the road at normal speed.

“By the shop.”

“That’s very convenient.”

Dean grunted in reply. He focused all his attention on his hands in his lap. If he tried really hard, maybe he could pretend he was somewhere else, like a shooting range or a bar.

“Dean, I must apologize for my behavior earlier. You were right to be angry with me. The lifestyle I live means I am surrounded by people who obey my whims without delay. Sometimes I forget that not everyone works for me. Will you please accept my apology?”

“Sure. Whatever.”

“Dean, look at me.”

The hangnail on his middle finger suddenly became increasingly fascinating.

“Dean…”

 _Don’t do it, man. Don’t do it. You forgave him and that’s it. You don’t have to look at him damn it!_ Dean thoughts were going rapid fire in his head. He resisted the urge to clench his fists. He didn’t want to seem too obvious.

“Dean Winchester. Look. At. Me.”

Dean's head popped up, eyes locking on Castiel’s. They were so blue it was unfair. He was frozen like a deer in headlights, staring wide-eyed into the blue depths before him. He jumped as he felt a hand gently rubbing small circles on his back. “Shh… calm down…” He relaxed into the seat as Cas’ hand moved to his knee. “Good boy.” Dean shivered at those words and Cas’ eyes filled with concern. “Are you cold? Come, let me warm you up with some coffee.” Cas stepped out of the car. They had stopped moving to Dean’s surprise and were parked in front of the diner Cas was suppose to go to.

Before Dean could really process the information his passenger door opened. He was quickly snapped out of his head. Did this fucker really just open the door for him like he was a fucking princess?! Dean leaned his head out to glare at Cas who smiled at him warmly. Fuck him. Dean grabbed the door from the man and closed it again, only to reopen it himself and step out. He can open his own god damn doors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why, yes I did make Dean a colorguard guy... because colorguard is awesome and I can! It can be a pretty badass activity by the way.


	4. Lunch Time with the Freak Squad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know those chapters that you write, re-read and you're like "wow... that's crap-tastic!" and then re-write a hundred times and you're eventually like "fuck it" and just post it anyway because you're finally resigned to your own mediocrity? Yeah... this was one of those chapters...

As soon as Dean stepped foot inside the diner he knew he made a terrible mistake. If Cas was strange, what the hell was he suppose to expect from his friends?! A boisterous group of people motioned them over. They had put together five tables in the back. There were about thirty people. Dean gulped and took a step towards them, _here goes nothing_.

Before he could actually go anywhere, he felt a tight unrelenting grip on his wrist. He turned around to see Cas cheerfully waving and the people, but pulling Dean to the other side of the diner. They stopped in front of a booth with four people. The group was more reserved and less rowdy than the others in the back. On one hand, Dean was thankful for the calmer atmosphere, but when there were less people things usually got more personnel and he really didn’t want to get personnel with these people. In looking them over, there were two guys and two girls. The girls both very attractive in very different ways, a brunette with her hair done in a bun wearing a grey pantsuit, typing away on her laptop and a redhead with green eyes in jeans and a plaid shirt, Dean’s kind of girl. Besides them sat two men, both grinning at him, one mischievously with a lollipop in his mouth and a twinkle in his eyes that spelled trouble and the other had neatly messed up hair and was smiling at Dean also, a smile that was… a little bit too friendly for his taste…

“Dean, these are my acquaintances, Naomi Angell, Anna Milton, Gabriel Puck, and-”

“Balthazar Roché. You must be Dean Winchester. You are an incredible handsome man indeed.”

Dean prayed to whatever God was fucking around with him that his face wasn’t as red as it felt. What the hell is wrong with these people?!

“My apologies, Dean, Balthazar has a habit of being unnecessarily blunt,” Cas said as he pulled up two chairs to the head of the table and offered Dean a seat.

Dean snorted. _Yeah… Balthazar was the ONLY one who has a habit of being unnecessarily blunt… yeah, right…_ He sat next to Anna, who was beaming at him. She was very pretty. A nice smile. He smiled back at her. She started to say something, but was cut off.

“So, you’re the guy who thinks my movie is crap,” Gabriel mused while playing with the cherry on top of his strawberry milkshake.

“Uh…”

“No it’s fine. Cassie here already explained to us over breakfast your way of thinking. I’m a little surprised you came with him though. You seemed like the type who wouldn’t venture off out of his circle of heterosexuals. Does it bother you?”

“Does what bother me?”

“Oh, leave him alone, Gabe. Ignore them, Dean. They enjoy watching people squirm,” Anna said gesturing to Gabriel and Balthazar.

“You know I can’t resist playing when I see fresh meat, little Anna. What fine fresh meat we have too,” Balthazar smirked as he looked at Dean appreciately. This whole thing was weirding him out. He had to get the hell out of this place, screw the coffee, lunch, or whatever Cas was going to treat him to.

“He’s panicking, Castiel,” Naomi said offhandedly as she was typing away at her laptop, not even bothering to glance his way as if he was beneath her.

Cas’ hand gently grabbed Dean’s knee (to which unfortunately calmed him down greatly) as he steered the conversation to the dynamics between their characters. It turns out that Anna and Balthazar were Cas’ fellow main characters in the movie, while Gabriel was the director and Naomi was one of the writers. As the conversation went on, Dean shook Cas’ hand off his knee (mostly because he was unsettled by how comforting the sensation was) and the man moved it to his own lap as if he intended to do it the entire time. _Stupid smooth bastard…_ The waitress came and took their orders and left the circle back to their conversation. Dean ordered sweet potato pie. Although his favorite was apple, this diner made the best sweet potato pie in the history of all pie and they only offered it seasonally so while it was the holiday season in Spellhaven, he will take full advantage. He can almost taste the pie now. Creamy and sweet, feel it on his tongue, as his taste buds are sent to a better place. The perfect golden crust, exactly the way he liked it. Hard enough for support yet moist and soft to the point where it just melts in your mouth. My god… Dean was practically salivating as he daydreamed about his pie. Mmm… pie…

“Isn’t that right, Dean?” Cas’ gruff voice snapped him out of his reverie.

“Huh? Yeah, sure,” Dean responded instinctually, not quite knowing what the question was, but the table erupted in laughter, everyone except Naomi. Laughter was obviously beneath her. He looked at Cas questioningly. What the hell did he say yes to?

“Well, while you were off in your own little dream land, I was telling them you were imagining hot steamy sex with my car. You have quite a fondness for her.”

“Hey! First of all, screw you! My mind was on pie, thank you very much. Second of all, that car is a work of art. I would never defile a beauty like that,” Dean was obviously appalled by the implication. Having sex with that car was like someone masturbating on the Mona Lisa. You don’t do that man! You don’t.

Balthazar’s laughter escalated to new heights, “My god! That’s priceless!!! He dismissed the notion not because it was a car, but because the car was a work of art… and he didn’t want to taint it!” he was soon laughing so hard he could no longer talk and the rest of the group joined in. Even Naomi allowed a small amused smile to grace her lips. Dean just rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair with a shaking head, resigned to becoming the unofficial entertainment. As Balthazar finally caught his breath and sighed he looked over the resigned man and smiled, “Castiel, I can see why you have a crush on this one. He’s a real character.”

_Dean… Don’t let that effect you… don’t! Don’t let your face grow red… ignore that comment… stupid motherfucker!_ Dean was having an internalized war inside of him. The comment of Cas’ crush obviously getting to him, which it shouldn’t. His cheeks grew slightly flushed, not enough for anyone to really tell, but he could feel it. He continued to stare at the ceiling, willing his heart to calm down. _It’s no big deal. It was just a stupid comment from a grade A douchebag._ Dean let his eyes glance over at Cas, hoping to find the man ignoring Balthazar as well, but what he saw instead were blue eye staring at him with affection and humor in them. He looked like a teenage girl regarding his crush, which made Dean’s face go completely red.

“The fuck, Cas?!” he spat, which led the blue-eye man to fall into a fit of laughter.

Dean pointedly ignored everyone until his order came out, two delectable slices of sweet potato pie. He didn’t even bother to see if everyone was enjoying their food. He vaguely remembers them ordering fries, salads, or something lunchy like that, but right now… was pie time. He put his fork into the first slice, admiring the way the rich substance gave way to the pointed teeth of the fork. Lifting the first bite to his mouth, he took note of the small holes and crevices, anticipating the savory flavor on his tongue. As he takes the fork full into his mouth, his eyes slide shut. A low moan emits from his lips. It’s so good… He slowly pulls the fork out and chews. His lips stretching into a satisfied lazy smile. After he is finish chewing and swallows, he soon realizes that the table it far too quiet. He cautiously opens one eye to find that everyone is looking at him (except of course Naomi because she really couldn’t give a damn about him). Gabe looked impressed. Balthazar and Anna seemed very… flustered. Cas… well… he looked at Dean with the eyes of a predator zeroing in on his prey. Intense and hungry.

“Cas, not for nothing, but the last person who looked at me like that...I got laid,” Dean said smugly and gave a little wink to Cas, who in turn averted his eyes. Finally! It’s about time he one uped that jerk.

“Hey kid! Ever thought of doing porn? There’s a real place in the industry for-”

“Gabe! Stop trying to recruit people for your gross pornos!” Anna hissed at him.

“Chillax, babe. You know I don’t make pornos, that’s all mere speculation. I’m just making a general statement for good ole’ Deano here.”

“Well, I’m flattered,” Dean interjected. Really, he was under had no delusions when it came to his appearance. He knew he looked good. “So, I was wondering why you guys are here filming. Christmas and Kwanza is coming up, Hanukkah is here. Shouldn’t you guys be home with your families and stuff?”

To his surprise, Naomi was the first to speak up, “I find holidays to be distracting. They’re not really of any use.”

“Well, ain’t you a ball of sunshine,” Dean said as he took another bit of his amazing melt-in-your-mouth send your taste buds to Nirvana pie.

“She’s an Angell. They’re a stuffy bunch for sure. I’m going home tomorrow. I was just staying for the holiday party tonight. I made sure it would be a real treat for everyone,” Gabe smiled a smile that clearly indicated that Dean would not want to be near whatever the man had plan for the party later on.

Anna said that she actually had family in town that she would be visiting and spending her Christmas with, Balthazar was going to Europe (he did not specify where exactly or who he was going to see, but that he was simply going to Europe).

“What about you, Cas?” Dean asked genuinely interested for some odd reason.

“I don’t have any family that I would want to see this holiday season. I already sent them my gifts, which is way more than they deserve in my opinion. I will not grace them with my presence. I decided I was going to have a nice quiet Christmas in your small little town of Spellhaven. I do not require festivities this year.”

“Hell no. Not  on my watch. You aren’t spending Christmas alone. You’re coming over to my house and you’re going to get drunk off eggnog, sing _Dominic the Donkey_ so many times you get physically sick, and have a fucking great time with us ignorant small town folks. Capiche?” Dean had no idea why it mattered to him so much that Cas be somewhere and with someone during the holiday season. Maybe it was the fleeting twinge of sadness he saw in the man’s eyes when he mentioned his family. Or maybe it was the mask that swiftly shifted into place afterward, a mask that said he didn’t give a crap, a mask that Dean was far too familiar with.

Cas’ eyes shone with gratitude and appreciation. It made Dean, for lack of a better word, peaceful. Soon, however, Cas’ features morphed into and his eyes were now taunting. He smirk and said in a low seductive voice, “My my… I must say, Dean, you make me all tingly when you take control like that.” With that, Dean peace was broken, and he was internally cursing out the asshole as he almost choked on the piece of pie he had be eating.

“Fuck off, Cas…” Dean grumbled and finished off his pie, his sweet sweet potatoey delicious pie.

“Alright, Dean and I must be off. I have to drop him off home and then I’ll circle back to the set for the meeting with the producers. Dean?” Cas looked at him expectedly as he stood up.

“Oh! I guess I’m leaving. I was a very… interesting experience meeting you guys,” Dean said as he shook each of their hands (except Naomi because when he extended his hand to her she just focused on her laptop and typing).

“It was very good meeting you, Dean. If Cas hasn’t already staked his claim and your into red heads,” she slid him a piece of paper with her number and smiled, “call me.” Dean picked up the paper and smirked. Anna was cute enough. She could be fun.

“But if it turns out that you’re into hot men with French accents, turn the paper around,” Balthazar said and Dean carefully followed his instructions to find another number on the back, “then you can call ME.” Dean was no longer smugly smiling, but was staring in horror at the man.

To make things worse, both Anna and Balthazar joined together to speak in unison, “Or you could call us both for a three-way.” Dean was no truly horrified and red-faced. He walked away from the table without another word still gripping the piece of paper for some reason. As he walked out of the diner’s doors he heard the table of weirdoes say goodbye for the final time. He was just happy to get out of there. He waited by the car for Cas to come out. After a few more seconds, the other man emerged from the diner and opened the car door. Dean climbed into the passenger seat.

“So...” Cas started as he slid into the driver’s seat, “are you going to call them?”

“What? Fuck, no!”

“Then why are you holding on to that piece of paper so tight?”

Dean looked down and saw the piece of paper with the numbers still in his hands. “I-I think I’m still in shock… my fist won’t open.”

Cas just stared at him emotionlessly for a couple beats and a small snickered escaped his lips. He was obviously trying his best not to show his amusement at Dean’s distress and was failing miserably.

“Shut up and just drive!” Dean snapped while crumbling the paper in his hand and throwing it out the window.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Seeing Dean throw out the paper pleased Castiel greatly. He didn’t know why it did exactly. Yes, he was trying to seduce Dean an ultimately bring another playmate into the fold, but he wanted nothing more than a playmate. It shouldn’t matter if Dean had sex with other people, Cas did. Still the gesture made him happy. The car ride went by in silence. Not a forced or awkward silence, but a pleasant one. It was staggering to think that they’ve known each other for such a short period of time. The silence between them felt very comfortable, like a silence between two good friends.

When Cas drops Dean off, he looks at the man and smiles, “Dean… I… I am very grateful that you opened up your home to me.”

“Not a problem, Cas… You seem like you needed it,” Dean called over his shoulder as he walked toward his front steps.

 As he drives away, he wonders how this mechanic he just met saw the flame behind his mask. Castiel tries his best to hide it, tries his best to pretend like he is in control and confident and as an actor he has almost perfected it to a science, but in reality he sometimes feels like he’s a burning inferno raging wildly. He hates it, but he has his playmates to help him. They help him quell his emotions to a controlled burn. Cas also saw a sort of darkness in Dean when they were talking in their previous car ride. Perhaps they were kindred spirits, the pain in their souls calling out to one another. Maybe that’s why they are becoming more comfortable with one another rather easily. For the first time since he met the man, Castiel thought about Dean not just as a sexual conquest, but as a hope friend for the future. Then he cursed himself, _ridiculous emotions!_ He didn’t have time for emotions, just pleasure. Emotions always hurt, especially the ones that start of good. Pleasure starts out good and ends good and when it ends it’s done and you can move on with life easily.

He pulled up to the meeting spot. Not many people were there yet. He expected to be early and he was. He climbed out the car only and walked towards the door, but stopped. Through the clear door someone stood smiling back at him. The smile was cold. Castiel elected to go back and wait in his car, he didn’t want to be anywhere near that man alone. He would wait for his friends to come from the diner. Before he turned around the man stepped out the door and walked toward him. A mask of cool indifference slid on his face as he greeted the man in front of him, “Michael.”

The man’s smile widened, “Castiel… it’s been a long time, brother.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah yeah... I know... Cliche ending. Whatever. 
> 
> Also, I just want to apologize. In re-reading this I didn't realize how much I focused on the pie. If you couldn't tell... I am really craving sweet potato pie right now.


	5. The Family Buisness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This isn't going to be a light chapter. It's actually serious. I elected in my brainstorming of this fic to tackle a few issues I thought were necessary, but there is one thing that I wasn't going to include and I have changed my mind. 
> 
> This issue that I have changed my mind about is transphobia. Transphobia is a very serious issue that none of us should ignore. I was planning to wait until another story of mine to dive into it, but in light of recent occurrences I am going to be dealing with it in this fic. This chapter has a little introduction to it. In the coming chapters of my story I am going to be addressing a lot of misunderstandings regarding sexuality and identity. I am going to attempt to deal with the opposition and the discrimination. This is going to be a learning experience me too because I have never done something like this so please be patient with me.
> 
> The reason why I am introducing transphobia into this story is because of the unfortunate passing of Leelah Alcorn, a transgender female who took her life due to the depression brought on by her parents. My heart goes out to everyone who may be feeling the same as Leelah did. Please, you are not a alone.
> 
> If any of you are depressed or suicidal please reach out. 
> 
> RIP Leelah Alcorn and all those who have been pushed into taken their own life because of others

 

 

Castiel looked at Michael with an indifferent gaze. It took all his self-restraint to not reach out and choke him. He was being looked at, with cold assessing eyes, green and piercing. Cas took note that these green eyes, that he has come to loathe, were superficial and filled with deceit. Those eyes were very unlike Dean’s eyes, which reminded him of the purity of nature. Everything about Michael was artificial. Everything from his eyes, his smile, even the way he called Cas “brother”. The irony that Castiel was the actor in the family didn’t slip by him unnoticed.

“How have you been, little brother? I never get a chance to talk to you alone.”

“If I wanted to talk with you alone I would’ve done so already,” Castiel replied flatly.

“Castiel… you’ve grown into quite the rebel. I don’t know if I’m disappointed or impressed,” Michael said as he ushered Cas into the building with a hand on the small of his back. The touch was light, but spoke of authority. It told Cas that obedience was expected. He dutifully let himself be led into the meeting room. He sat down at the long table, facing the older man who was closing the door behind them. Michael remained standing (always having to pick the position of most power).

“Did you want to discuss my role privately before the others arrived?”

“Of course not, little brother, I was hoping we could talk about personal matters. Catch up.”

“Michael, if I didn’t make it clear already with my actions then I will use my words. You are not my brother. I am not an Angell. I am a Novak. Our relationship will be strictly professional. You are the producer and co-writer of the movie and I am one of your lead actors. If you’d like to talk to me regarding the film, then I will listen, but anything outside of that is off limits,” the fire in Castiel grew wild as he was talking. By the time he was done his breaths were coming out heavier and his fists balled up ever so slightly. _Control yourself, Castiel… control…_

Michael on the other hand seemed very please by cracks he was seeing in Castiel’s discipline, “Don’t be that way, little brother. I know you see yourself as a Novak and you see Jimmy as your only brother-”

“Jolie!!! HER name was Jolie and SHE was my fucking SISTER!!!!!” Cas was about to punch the fucking bastard in the face, but stopped short when he saw the self-satisfied smirk on the asshole’s lips. He lowered his fist and took a couple deep breaths. He was utterly thrown off balance by the mention of his dead sister. He knew he was probably the picture of madness at the moment. As he heard car doors closing and laughter of people arriving he rushed pass Michael and out of the meeting room. He went the opposite direction of the entrance. There were shouts of “Castiel!” and “Cassie!” from behind him, but he made his way into the men’s restroom, keeping his back to them, not wanting to reveal to his aquantanices how broken he truly was. After locking to door he went to the mirror. A wild-eyed man stared back at him. The man’s breathing was labored; his heart trying to escape the prison of his chest, his face was flushed, and every muscle tense. Turning the faucet on and cupping his hands, Cas splashed cold water on his face.

After a few minutes of calming himself, he coolly walked back to the meeting room. Everyone was there. Balthazar motioned him over to a seat by him and Anna. The producers, Michael and Raphael Angell were going over the movie schedule for the upcoming year. Their sister, Naomi Angell, sat next to them taping away on her laptop per usual. Castiel sat with the rest of the cast and crew, taking notes and asking question when needed. He kept things professional. He remained in control.

As soon as the meeting ended, he left. Went to his car and drove back to the hotel. His emotions were still whirling inside of him. When he got into his room he immediately called his assistant.

“Tina.”

“Hello, Mr. Novak, how may I help you?” the young woman asked from the other end of the line.

“I am aware that you are leaving later today to go home for the holidays, but I need to relax. I know this is a lot to ask, but are you available right now? You have the highest pain tolerance out of the group of subs,” Castiel made a silent prayer to the universe that she said yes. He needed a plump backside to work his frustration out on.

“Yes, sir. I’ll be up in about fifteen minutes.”

With her affirmation he hung up the phone and busied himself around the room to set up the scene. He always found it oddly comforting, setting up the scene. He felt his stress level decline as his muscles got loser. He smiled. He finally got to be in control once more.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

***JUNE 19 TH, 1993***

Castiel sat with his twin, Jimmy Novak, watching Dead Poets Society on VHS. Castiel was absolutely entranced by the film. He told himself that when he was older he’d make movies like that too. His dream was to become an actor and act in a role that would inspire others to be who and what they choose to be, who they’re meant to be.

“One day, Jimmy, I’m going to make movies just like Robin Williams and people are going to be sitting on their couches and popping in the VHS tape of MY movie.”

“As if…” Jimmy said with a roll of his eyes.

“My God, Jimmy! What’s your damage?! There’s nothing wrong with having goals,” Cas said disapprovingly as he looked at his twin. He was going to scold some more considering he was the big brother (it doesn’t matter if he was only born 23 minutes before his sibling… older was older!), but he was interrupted by a knock on the door. He groaned as he slowly got off the couch, mother was always forgetting the house keys. He went to the door without taking his eyes off the T.V. and opened it for his mother without a single glance at her and went back to the movie.

It took Castiel a moment to realize that his mother was not coming into the house. He went back to the opened door to find that his mother wasn’t there at all. Instead, two police officers stood with grim expressions.

“Son… is your father home?” one of the officers asked.

“No. My dad doesn’t live with us,” Cas was becoming unsettled. He felt his twin come up behind him.

The two officers looked at each other gravelly. As they proceeded to describe the fatal car crash that took their mother’s life, Castiel and Jimmy gripped each other tightly. They were all each other had left.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Dean came home, he was surprised to see Bobby semi-conscious. He nodded to the man who did nothing, but grunt in response and stare at the wall. He continued his way to the den and hopped on the computer. He typed in the name “Castiel Novak” and found the man’s biography. He was born in 1984(making him 4 years older than Dean). His parents were Miranda Novak and Chuck Angell. It turns out his mother was the father’s mistress considering Chuck Angell was already married to another woman and had children. Miranda Novak died in a car crash in 1993 at the age of 31. He also had a twin brother named Jimmy Novak who died two years ago. There was no cause of death listed for the brother, which was odd. Before Dean continued reading there was a knock on the door. Bobby grunted a few times indicating that he wasn’t going to get it.

With a sigh Dean went to the door to be greeted with three very professional looking people. He recognized one of them. Cas introduced him to her earlier. He name was Naomi Angell. She stood behind two very intimidating men. They weren’t huge and muscular or anything, but the way they held themselves spoke of power. There was a black man and a white man. They smiled at Dean, but there wasn’t a hint of sincerity in either of their expressions.

“Hello, you must be Dean Winchester,” the white man said as he held out his hand, “My name is Michael Angell.”


	6. Rich Turds on a Porch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I'm really sorry for the wait. Caught a tummy virus... Anyway, I've been thinking about the story a lot and all I have to do is get it on paper. Hopefully I can communicate it well with you guys.
> 
> Also sorry for such a short chapter. I'm working on a longer one that should be out in a day or two. *crosses fingers*
> 
> Sam is introduced in the next chapter!!!!!!! So excited! I've been wanting to get Sammy in here =)

 “Hello, you must be Dean Winchester,” the white man said as he held out his hand, “My name is Michael Angell.”

Dean warily shook his hand and then the other man’s hand, whose name was Raphael. Naomi was far too focused on the phone in her hand to acknowledge the bewildered man. Dean’s mind went back to the article he was reading. Chuck Angell was Castiel’s father and before him stood three Angells. These must be Cas’ half brothers and sister. Dean also remembered the animosity that Cas seemed to have for his family and he instantly hated the people in front of him (which wasn’t very hard considering he already thought of Naomi as a snob).

“What do you want?!” Dean snapped eyeing the group in front of him.

“We just wanted to talk to you about our little brother, Castiel. We are very concerned about him. Naomi has informed us of his Christmas plans and it’s worrying,” Michael slipped on a mask of concern. It was a very good front. If Dean wasn’t Dean, then he wouldn’t be able to tell that it was a load of bullshit. Michael continued, “Castiel has been through many trials recently and despite his positive façade, he is quite unstable. It’s for the best that he is with family, but he has closed himself off from us.”

“Yes, Castiel is very dear to us. We value family very highly,” Naomi added in a distracted tone.

“That’s very understandable. I’m still not sure why you’re here telling me this. Don’t you think that is something that you need to work out with Cas?” Dean asked warily. He really wanted to tell these rich turds to get the hell of his porch (well… Bobby’s porch…), but he spent most of his life getting out of bad situations and lying so many times to do so it practically became a profession. Dean wasn’t stupid; he knew when to tread lightly.

Raphael wasn’t nearly as calm as his other siblings, bitterness was practically dripping off each word he said, “Our brother has taken a liken to you for some odd reason. He’s adamant about his separation from us. We need you to convince him otherwise.”

“Cas is his own man. I’m certain he can make his own choices.”

“Dean, we are certain of that as well. Yet the question still stands, ‘will it be the correct choice?’ and we fear not. We rather keep this between siblings, but since Castiel is obviously picking small town hicks over his prestigious family, you have now been roped into this affair.” The way Michael said ‘small town hicks’ with an acidity that echoed Raphael’s made Dean want to sock the stiff neck snooty asshat in the jaw. Michael feigned utter innocence as if he just realized what he said might’ve angered Dean, “Oh! I’m so sorry. I of course wasn’t referring to you in regards of ‘small town hicks’. I apologize if you were offended; it was certainly not my intention.”

Since Dean could see through the man’s apologetic pretense he knew that the asshole was completely and utterly satisfied with his insult. He smiled to himself. He knew exactly how to handle this joker. He carried on the conversation with a carefree smile he’d imagine a typical ‘small town hick’ would wear. He agreed when he needed to, asked questions when he already knew the answer in order to feign ignorance, and turned up the charm because if there is one thing Dean had, it was charm. By the end of the conversation, he promised the three siblings that he would talk to Cas. Told them if he still didn’t want to see them for the holidays they were invited to the Christmas party as well. Basically lied through his teeth, but it was nothing Dean wasn’t used to.

Michael starred at him through narrowed eyes. It was as if he was looking into his soul or something. Finally he smiled and told Dean, “I can see why my brother is interested in you, Winchester. Happy holidays.” With that the three were gone.

Well… fuck… Ever since that asshole picked up his car, Dean’s life went into a tailspin. It was ridiculous. Dean slammed the front door in anger and walked to his room, passing Mr. Comatose on the way, who drank himself back into oblivion while the conversation was going on. He considered going back to the den to read more of Cas’ bio, but he didn’t want to get too involved with him. He would keep the invitation for the Christmas party open, cancelling would be a dick move, but he figured the sooner he cut things off with Castiel the better. The way Michael Angell looked at him told Dean these weren’t people to be trifled with.

“I should call Cas,” he said to no one in particular. Dean picked up his phone and searched through his contacts and… “Fuck!” Dean didn’t have his number. Why would he? He barely knew the dude. He remembered that Cas called him earlier in the day, so all he had to do is go to recent calls and- the stupid son of a bitch called from a blocked number. Wasn’t that just peachy… There was nothing he could do. Well, there was one thing he could do. Sleep. The mattress was beckoning him to lie down and close his eyes. It didn’t quite hit him till now how much a nap was necessary. He lay down on the bed, not even bothering to change his clothes or take off his shoes. He just closed his eyes and let the darkness take him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah... super short chapter... I know. Better one coming soon!


	7. Surprise Visitors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... here's the next chapter. Just an fyi, the spring semester is about to start for me and thins time I'll be taking 5 classes. Hopefully I'm still diligent with posting more chapter, but if I'm falling behind it's probably because my work load is getting to me.

Dean woke up to the sound of _Carry On My Wayward Son_ blasting in the room. The goddamn phone was too fucking loud for him. He groaned and reached into his pocket only to find it empty. He let out a tiny whimper of complaint. Dean had to actually open his eyes and look for the thing. When he did it wasn’t on the bed, or on the small bookshelf next to his bed, nor on the floor. It took a little bit too long in Dean’s disoriented state to realize that the noise was coming from underneath him. Right when he got the device from beneath his bed the call was lost. He looked at the screen (which was freaking bright, Jesus!) and saw that he had 3 missed calls from the same unknown number. “Probably some stupid advertising agency or something…” he muttered as he turned off his phone and drifted back to sleep.

Hours later, Dean woke with a start. Something was wrong. He turned on his phone and waited for it to come back on. The room was dark. He realized that he must’ve slept through the afternoon and into the night. Looking down at his phone, he read the time silently to himself, 8:49pm. It wasn’t too late. He listened closely to what might’ve woken him up. He heard the now familiar sound of Bobby’s snores which indicated that the man was still asleep. He also heard the clinking of glass and the soft murmur of voices. There was someone else in his house. Or more possibly… someones. His hand instinctually went under his pillow and he cursed. His mind went back to Bobby telling Dean that since his father was gone and that the danger that came with him was no longer a threat, Dean needed put the past away, starting with the gun he always kept under his pillow. He took out a couple of books from the bookshelf as quietly as he could and got his m9 army knife in its sheathing that he hid behind them and tucked it into his waistband. You can say a lot about his father, but you couldn’t say he left his sons defenseless. He stealthily went to the door and grabbed his sabre on the way. Granted, it wasn’t sharpened, but if he smashed someone’s head in with the hilt, they’d be out cold. He wielded his weapon (hilt up) and crouched silently toward the kitchen where he heard the noise. Then a loud reverberating laughter startled him. Sammy?

“Ha! Alright, knock knock jokes!” Sammy said in an excited tone.

There must’ve been some sort of response because Sammy reassured the person that he had the best jokes in the world. Dean took pity on whatever person had to endure his little brother’s jokes because they were god awful.

“Okay… Knock knock.”

The person must’ve asked “Who’s there?”

Sammy replied with a little chuckle, “To.”

Dean was steadily approaching the kitchen where Sammy was having his conversation (which from his position sounded quite one sided). He was now just around the corner and could hear a soft sigh and a familiar voice ask “To who?” You could practically hear the eye roll in the question.

“Nuh uh uhh… It’s to WHOM!” with that Sam bursts out into a fit of laughter.

When he rounded the corner, he saw his corny ass little brother with his back turned to him, hunched over and cracking up. Castiel stood in front of him, looking quite bemused with Sam. Cas’ eyes snapped up to Dean’s and his lips quirked into a relieved smile as if he was being rescued from a pit of lions or in this case, a giant moose with a horrible sense of humor. Sam, finally realized that he was the only one laughing at his joke and looked up. Seeing that, Castiel was looking pass him, he turned around.

“DEAN!!!” he said with a big smile and went over to his older brother, scooping him into a hug. It never fails to surprise Dean that his little brother, little Sammy, could actually pick him up and Dean Winchester was no small man.

“Hey, Sammy! Nice to see ya. Now put me down you, man child!” Sam put Dean back on his feet. “What are you doing here man?! I thought you said you were going to miss Christmas here and fly in for the New Year?”

“Well, it turns out my plans got switched around. I’ll be here for Christmas, but I’m leaving the 27th. Jess said her parents decided to do a New Year’s bash and they really want me there. I know Christmas is more important to you anyway.”

“Yeah, man. It’s real good to see you.” Dean knew that he was grinning at Sammy like an idiot, but he hasn’t seen the kid since the summer and that was too long to be away from his little brother.

“Yeah. It’s awesome to see you too, but-” Sam’s voice dropped to a low whisper “Dude… Castiel Novak is standing in the kitchen...” he said it with such an excited grin that reminded Dean that Cas wasn’t just some dude, but he was a famous Hollywood actor.

“Hello, Dean,” Cas’ smile was gone now and he looked Dean over from head to toe, not in an appraising way Balthazar did in the diner, but as if he was searching for injuries. Then his eyes settled on Dean’s like they were still searching for something. The actor looked… worried.

“Cas, is there something wrong?” Dean asked him and before he could be answered, Sam interjected.

“Dean! Did you just call him Cas?! You’re on a nickname basis with a celebrity?!”

Cas smiled fondly at Sam and returned his gaze to Dean and asked him if they could speak privately.

Dean suddenly realized that he still had his sabre in his hand and put it down against the wall. He told Sam that he’d be a sec and escorted Cas to his room and closed the door.

“What’s up, man? What are you even doing here anyway?”

“I apologize for coming here. After my meeting earlier today, I went to my hotel for some… relaxation time. While I was there, Michael called saying that he paid you a visit. I wanted to make sure you were alright. I called a couple times, but there was no answer and after a while it went straight to voice mail. I couldn’t stay at the hotel as if there was nothing wrong. I was worried, Dean. How are you? What did Michael say to you?” Castiel’s eyes searched his once more. His features were etched with concern and unlike his brother Michael, the concern was genuine. Maybe he wasn’t such an asshole after all.

“Um… thanks, I guess…” Dean nervously rubbed the back of his neck. He wasn’t sure what to say to the man, “I’m good. Really. Your family is a piece of work though.”

Cas made a face of disgust, “I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t refer to those people as my family. I am a far cry from an Angell.”

“Well, according to them, you are one of their top priorities. Family importance and all that stuff.”

“Dean… you still didn’t tell me what he said.”

“Um… he just told me that he didn’t think you could make the right choices and that I should convince you to spend the holiday with them.”

“Anything else?”

“Not really…”

“Dean! You’re not telling me something…” Cas’ voice dropped to a deep growl. His eyes were intense and fixated upon Dean.

Without a second thought the words spilled from Dean’s lips, “He said he could see why you are so interested in me.” Castiel’s face paled. Did he say something wrong? He quickly tried to remedy the situation, “It’s no big deal right? You’re not that interested in me. We just happened to cross paths and help each other out. You offered me a chance to ride your sweet ass car, I’m giving you company for Christmas. That’s all. When you get bored with us ‘small town hicks’ you’ll just go your way.”

“Don’t degrade yourself, it’s beneath you,” Cas’ tone was one that should not be questioned. He started to pace the room, in deep thought.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_Fuck…_ Cas thought as he considered about what the green-eyed man told him. _Why would Michael be interested in Dean?_ Castiel stopped in his tracks. _No… the real question is: why am I interested in Dean._ This whole thing started with him meeting a very attractive mechanic with submissive tendencies. He thought he could add a new toy to his little collection to keep him from getting bored. The other man was definitely an amusement to him. He enjoyed seeing him flustered and blushing, he enjoyed taking in the confused look that would come over the mechanic’s face when his emotions would rage war against the idiotic homophobic ideals engrained in his mind. Castiel looked at the man to find him watching. Dean was watching him, but there was uncertainty and caution in his eyes. Cas became aware that his face was screwed up in a grimace. He softened his features and smiled at Dean. This man in such a short time threw his whole life in a tailspin. How? He wasn’t sure yet. True, Castiel was definitely attracted to him sexually and also true, that the “straight” young man before him posed as a challenge (and boy did he like challenges). But there was something else. Maybe it was the fact that Dean could be so guarded and put together one minute, but then utterly open the next. An actor with their heart on their sleeve. It was very uncommon.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cas had been staring at Dean a little bit too long for his comfort. _What the fuck is wrong with this dude?_ He was just about to tell the man off when there was a crashing sound coming from the direction of the kitchen. _Oh no…_ Dean expression turned panicked.

“Dean… what’s wrong?” Cas’ expression mirrored his own, but there was an aspect of question in his eyes that wasn’t in Dean’s. No… Dean knew exactly what that sound meant.

“Sam!” he yelled and ran out of his room. He could hear Cas’ foot falls behind him. When he finally got to Sam his horrors were confirmed. Another loud crash echoed in his ears and Dean’s breath caught in his throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun dun....
> 
> What's going to happen?! Is Sam alright or is he hurt? Is Sam the cause of the crash or is there another surprise visitor lurking in their midst????? Has this happened before or is the new threat of the Angell family to blame?????
> 
> Will there even be another chapter or will I be too caught up with everyday life to go on?!?!?!
> 
> Come back again to find out...
> 
> (Dear mother of Chuck I have literally the worse cliffhangers... Is there a cliffhanger class I can take or something? This is so fucking cliched its not funny -_-)


	8. IT'S A SABRE!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... wow... been a while... Sorry for the wait everyone! Things got crazy and every time I tried to write it ended up getting deleted and it was a real mess. On top of that, the only crap I was able to write was crap so... yeah... super sorry to make you wait for this crappy chapter =D

Dean stared at his brother. The horror on his face swiftly turning to anger.

“SAM!!!”

“Calm down, Dean. It’s not a big deal. It’s just a sword,” his brother responded nonchalantly as he reached down to retrieve the sabre he dropped.

“First of all, it’s called a ‘sabre’! Secondly-”he snatches the weapon from his little brother’s hand, “you know you shouldn’t even touch my Sweetheart without my supervision, why’d you think you could spin it?!”

“I was just doing drop spins…”

“You can’t! You suck, Sammy! You already broke my riffle, are you trying to have a fucking track record?!”

The brothers continued arguing while Castiel looked on with utter bewilderment. He took in Sam’s physique. He didn’t seem ill or hurt. Castiel automatically assumed that something happened to Dean’s brother, but apparently that wasn’t the case.

“I don’t understand…”

The bickering came to a halt as the brothers remembered that Cas was still there. Dean cursed himself inwardly. He didn’t want to admit to Cas how much of a pansy he was, especially since the guy was gay. He didn’t want to give the wrong impression.

“Dean is just pissy because-” before Sam could finish Dean kicked him in the shin, “Ow!”

“Shut up, Sammy. Just don’t… don’t touch her, okay? Cas, you want a beer man?”

“Dean, you still haven’t explained the situation. I am afraid I am utterly lost. Why did we rush here to your brother? Are you okay Sam?”

“Yeah, Castiel. I’m fine. I just got bored when you two left and was messing around with my brother’s sword-

“Sabre!”

Sam rolled his eyes at Dean’s correction, “Fine… Sabre. I was messing with his sabre.”

Castiel eyed the weapon curiously. “May I?” he asked with a hand outstretch towards Dean and the sabre.

Dean’s face was filled of uncertainty. He wanted to tell the man to fuck off, but those glimmering blue eyes stopped him. He gulped and slowly handed the sabre to Cas, “Just be careful, alright? She’s already taken a beaten.” He bit out the last sentence with a glare in his brother’s direction.

“What is the purpose of this… sabre? Is it meant to be wielded as a weapon?”

“No. It’s for colorguard. My brother did it in high school. He was REALLY good, right Dean?”

“Eh… I was alright.” Dean shrugged trying to suppress a smug smile. He knew how good he was.

Cas smiled and looked that the sabre again. He handed it back to the mechanic. “Show me.”

That sentiment knocked Dean off his high horse. Cas wanted him to perform for him. Right now. A part of him wanted nothing more than to pull out the sabre routine that he sometimes practices in secret to reminisce on the good days and please the man, but there was another voice screaming in the back of his head. The voice was his father’s. The voice lashed out, attacking his love for guard and dancing, warning him about being around “that” crowd, and cursing him for the feelings that Dean couldn’t deny he got around the actor.

“Dean? What’s wrong?” Cas asked him.

“Uh… nothing. Nothing. I’m actually still pretty beat. I’m gonna catch some z’s,” he said as he began walking toward his room. “Nice seeing ya Cas! I appreciate your concern and all…” he disappeared around the corner out of sight.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel looked in the direction Dean went. He tilted his head, listening to the fading footfalls and then the quiet creak of a door closing. His mouth pressed into a hard line. With a whirl, he turned to face the younger brother, “Did I say something wrong?”

“No. Dean just gets a little embarrassed when strangers learn about him doing guard. Dad kinda hammered it in his head that it was a gay sport or some crap like that.”

“I’ve never heard of that activity before.”

“Oh! It’s like with marching band. The guard are the people who toss flags and weapons. It’s actually pretty awesome!” Sam grabbed his phone from his pocket and started tapping on it. “Here. Check this out.” He handed the phone to Castiel with a video playing on the screen.

Castiel watched as a marching band started their performance and as soon as the first note rang through the stadium, the camera zoomed in on Dean Winchester tossing a riffle high above his head with a double turn beneath it. The catch was solid and firm. The man’s face was dark and mysterious, matching the background music of Phantom of the Opera played by the band. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of Dean. The way he danced and managed his equipment entranced Castiel. Even as the camera panned out or changed angles, he kept his gaze trained on the gorgeous creature gliding across the field. As the video faded to black a simple word escaped his lips. “Beautiful…”

“Yeah, my brother is pretty awesome!” Sam’s face was dominated by a proud grin as he took his phone from Castiel. “There is this band league that you can only get in if you’re really good called DCI, the world division, and my brother could’ve done it, but… dad was pretty adamant against it.”

“Well that’s unfortunate.”

“Our father was a real dick.”

“Was?”

Sam nodded and the look on his face said that he didn’t want to talk about it. Castiel understood. Dead parents can be a hard subject to broach, even if your parent was a “real dick” as Sam phrased it.

Castiel thanked Sam for their talked and told him that he would see him at Christmas. Sam smiled and had another fanboy moment over him being a movie star. Castiel left the house and drove away. His thoughts immediately went to the video he watched. Despite the grim face Dean wore to match the theme of the show, Castiel could tell how much love he had for what he was doing. It was hard for him to reconcile the two images of Dean Winchester he has been introduced to, the gruff “manly man” mechanic and the graceful passionate performer. He couldn’t see them as the same person, yet he could easily see one in the other. It was a strange paradox that boggled Castiel mind.

 The vibrating of his phone startled him out of his reverie. He glanced at the screen momentarily and put it back down. One of his playmates was looking for some fun. He usually really enjoys his time with Greg, but he’d have to put off that for another night. The man can surely find another dom in their circle of friends. Tonight Castiel will not enjoy the pleasures of sex. No… he has something better in mind.

He sped down the road towards his hotel trying to remember the name of the video Sam had shown him. The urge to watch it again growing with each passing second.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that cliff hanger from last time was just a mock cliff hanger. Obviously nothing happened to Sam or anything, I just felt like pulling your leg.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for all those who left comments on my story. Every time I see a comment, it spurs me on to write more. They are great motivators!


	9. Everything in Order

 

 

 

Sam watched as Castiel’s car pulled away. It was a pretty sweet ride. He listened carefully to the silence in the house. The only interruption to it was Bobby’s snores and soft music emitting from the direction of his brother’s room. He listened closer and… oh god! Sam balked in horror. Was his brother listening to Taylor Swift?!

With a grimace plastered on his face, he slipped out the front door. Apparently a lot had changed since the summer when he was home. Bobby was back on the drinking bandwagon and Dean was listening to Blank Space. He walked around the familiar junk yard, remembering the times he and Dean would spend time together. The two of them playing games, the two of them hiding out from dad, Dean even taught him how to march here. Sam smiled at the memories. He was little sad that he had to blow Jess off for the holidays, but he’ll see her when class starts back up. He knows he picked right coming here.

Sam took out his phone and dialed a number.

“Wow… Didn’t expect to hear from you anytime soon…” the female voice dripped of sarcasm.

Sam scowled and rolled his eyes.

“Hey, tone down the bitch face, Sam. I can practically feel it from here.”

A reluctant smile crept on his face. He never got tired of talking to his supplier. “Whatever, Ruby. I was just calling to see if the shipment came in.”

“You know we get it on Christmas. Santa drops it off as a little gift. Now, tell me why you really called, Sam Winchester?”

“That’s it.”

“Sure, Sammy… sure it is. Did you set everything up? Make sure no one knows where you’re going?”

“Yeah. My brother thinks I’m going to spend New Years with Jess and she thinks I’m staying here the whole time.”

“Good. When are you going to leave her?”

Sam rolled his eyes again. The conversation always went here. “I’m not, Ruby. I love her and I’m always going to. There’s nothing you can say or do that’ll change that.”

 

“Yeah, that’s why you’re spending the holidays with me and NOT her.”

“I’m spending it with you because you know how strung out I get on that stuff. It’s not something you can just take in a bathroom and carry on with the rest of your day. I trust you to supervise. That’s all.”

Sam can practically sense the woman at the other end of the line smirking, but she remained silent. After a couple beats, she spoke up, “The boss wants to meet you.”

“What does Azazel want?”

“No… not him. Think higher up.”

Butterflies filled Sam’s gut. Maybe not butterflies… more like wasps. His gulp was audible over the line. “Who? Lilith?”

“Higher.”

Okay, the wasps officially turned to hornets. He felt like he was going to puke. This wasn’t good at all. He was silent for a long time before he gathered up enough courage to say, “Lucifer.”

“Yup. You guessed it. He wants to meet with you when you come.” Ruby sounded way too cheery for Sam’s liking. Was she happy that she just informed him of his death sentence?

“Can I ask ‘why’?”

“Of course you can. The boss just knows that you’ve been a really great customer. That’s it. You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s not a hit or something.”

Relieved, Sam sagged against the hood of an old car he was unconsciously gripping. He breathed deeply. Apparently he’d been holding his breath too. A chuckle from the other end floated from his phone.

He was about to make a witty reply when he heard his brother calling his name from the porch of the house. Footsteps were making their way towards him. He ended the call without another word and dropped the phone on the hood he was leaning against and looked up at the night sky. When Dean found him, he didn’t say anything to Sam. He just leaned against the hood besides his little brother and joined him in star gazing.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Days passed and it was Christmas Eve. Bobby was finally sobered up, well more than that. He was groomed and back to his old self. Ellen and Jo returned the day prior. Their time together was profitable. Ellen and Bobby were back on and all of Jo’s feelings were settled. She actually got a boyfriend while they were gone, which almost knocked Dean off his feet. Jo never brought a boy home. Ever. Well, Dean and Sam were finally going to be able to play their protective brother card and chew out whatever guy thought they were good enough for their Jo considering she invited him to the party later tonight. The punk’s name started with a C or something like that… Charlie or Chris… Dean forgot which one.

They had to prepare the house still for the evening. It was already twelve and people were supposed to come around four. Sam was out for a liquor run, Bobby was over at Ellen’s place lounging around and not doing anything for his own fucking house, but it was okay, Dean’s going to let it slide. Bobby has done so much for his family already. Doesn’t mean that Dean’s not at least a little ticked off. He gave the whole house another sweep down, dusting the place as he went. Music filled every room as he cleaned. Ella Fitzgerald’s Christmas soundtrack had him grooving and brooming. He wiped down all the counters, the windows and mirrors, all as he was dancing. The food that he slaved over was warming up. Sam came back with the rewards of his shopping. Dean used some of the rum his brother picked up making eggnog for the night. When he was done, he left to get ready.

He looked at the clock. He had two hours before anyone got there and he could take his sweet time. He went down the hall to the bathroom. The steam from the shower dominated the room quickly. It made everything warm and fuzzy, including Dean. He bathed himself with a lazy smile, his thoughts drifting like the fog. Eventually he started thinking about Cas. Even though the actor had a coolness to him and a self-confidence that made him want to sock the asshat in the jaw, there was a quirkiness to him that he couldn’t quite place. It was a bit endearing. Dean’s smile widened a fraction, his eyes closed peacefully as he let the water cascade around him.

_“Its Christmas time and I want to see Santa Claus…_

_Yes its Christmas time and I want to see Santa Claus._

_Gonna ask him for my baby._

_Aight that a real good cause!”_

Dean sang the song. Turning off the shower he still belted the notes of the Fitzgerald song. He hummed the notes of the song on and off as he brushed his teeth and shaved his face. Using the toilet, he continued:

_“Santa, send my baby send my baby send my baby back to me._

_Yeah! It’s Christmas time!_

_Santa send my baby back to me…_

_Back to me…”_

He wrapped the towel around his waist to walk back to his room, with the lyrics still on his lips he opened the door to find a smug looking Castiel leaning against the opposite wall.

Dean cursed and went to cover his bare upper body from that piercing gaze, but in the process the towel from his waist fell.

“Fuck me!” Dean growled as he hastily retrieved the towel to wrap around himself once more.

“I don’t think here is appropriate for that activity, Dean. Not with you brother so close by.” Cas wiggled his eyebrows at him as Dean’s whole body turned red. He didn’t want to think about him and Cas ever, especially when he was standing like a deer in headlights in front of the man. Cas continued with a rough voice “No Dean… we should go to your room first. There I could press you against the wall and fuck your tight hot hole until you pass out. Wouldn’t that be fun?”

Before Dean could tell him that it would not be fun… at all. He noticed his towel tenting. He didn’t think that it was possible to be more horrified then he was, but he was wrong. Very wrong. He raced pass Cas and ran to his room. Why the fuck did he get a boner? He- he just has a kink for getting held against the wall… that’s it. Nothing more. Fucking asshole! He distracted himself with thoughts of guns that he could use to shoot the actor with and waited for it to go down. There was no way in hell he was going to masturbate with that pervert probably outside his door.

After it went down he put his clothes on and slung the door open. Just as he expected, the other man was waiting for him.

“What the fuck are you doing here?! It’s three. You shouldn’t be here till four.”

“You were singing for Santa to send you your baby and here I am. You seemed pretty happy to see me earlier,” he said with a playful wink.

“Dude. You’re an asshole!!! I don’t know how you do things in California, but don’t just walk into someone’s house, surprise them when they leave the bathroom, and tell them you’re going to fuck them into the wall! I should just-” before Dean could say “kick you out of my house” he saw the look on Castiel’s face. His face was that of a little child. He saw rejection and fear and sadness in his eyes and it stopped Dean in his tracks. He went on with a softer voice “Shit… I’m sorry man. You just don’t do that stuff. Okay?”

Cas nodded with his eyes down casted. Dean didn’t think he’d be so sensitive. Cas didn’t seem like he would get so- wait a fucking minute. The fucker is playing him! Dean narrowed his eyes at him letting Castiel know that he was caught in his game. The actor smirked and took a dramatic bow before telling him that he’d be back in about an hour and he just wanted to stop by. Dean stood in the entrance of his room until he heard Castiel’s car drive away.

He muttered under his breath “Fucking prick,” as he went to go spend time with his brother before the guests arrive.[  
](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaFKnf69IH4)

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song that Dean was singing in the shower by the way is Good Morning Blues by Ella Fitzgerald (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaFKnf69IH4)
> 
> I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I'm trying to get as much writing done during spring break so keep you fingers crossed for me not to be extra busy!


	10. A Thing For Cas?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you once more for all those people who are kind enough to take time and leave comments. It means a lot to me to know that a couple of you are enjoying the story =)

The first to arrive were Bobby, Ellen, and Jo. Which was good because this was Bobby’s house and he better be the first one here. There were hugs all around. Dean joked with Jo on how he was going to grill her boyfriend and pull out all the stops. She opened her mouth as if she was going to say something but was interrupted by the door opening. A red headed girl walked in, Vulcan saluted everyone, and embraced Jo.

“Hey, babe. This is my brother Dean.” Jo sagged against the girl not daring to meet Dean’s eyes.

“Hey, dude! I’m Charlie Bradbury!” the girl reached out to shake Dean’s hand.

Dean could feel the beginnings of a mini panic attack. He starred at the hand in utter disbelief. Their little Jo was a lesbian. Fuck. Why didn’t she tell him sooner? Was she confused? She had to be confused, there was no other way that this could possibly be happening. Maybe this was a way to get back at her mom, but when he glances in Ellen’s direction she seems more intrigued with Dean’s reaction. Well, shit. Everyone was apparently watching Dean. Did they all know? At least Sam seems moderately surprised, but he’s watching Dean like a hawk. They couldn’t possibly be okay with this! Dean returned his eyes to Jo. A look of betrayal filling his face. But instead of seeing an “evil lesbian dyke” as his dad referred to them, all he saw was Jo. His not-really-but-might-as-well-be little sister that he adored. A tear rolled down her cheek. Her eyes were still not on him. She was scared of his reaction.

Dean smiled and shook the hand that was still in the air. “It’s nice to meet you Charlie,” a collective audible sigh filled the room. Ellen, Bobby, and Sam started talking again. “So… you’re dating Jo? I don’t think I have to tell you how much she means to me, but I swear… if you hurt her… I’m sure she’ll kick your ass for me so you better watch out.”

Jo beamed and gently shoved him, “Shut it, Dean.”

“What? It’s the truth. You’d totally kick her butt. You kick mine enough.”

Jo stuck her tongue out at him and he continued to tease her. Dean was surprised by how much he was liking Charlie as he talked to her. The girl was awesome (passed the big brother test with flying colors). In talking with them, Dean found out that part of the reason Jo freaked out on her mom and Bobby was because she was really stressing over hiding who she was. She actually had been seeing Charlie for over a year, but she didn’t know how people would react. When she came out to her mom as a homo-romantic asexual, her mom was very proud of her courage and was completely accepting. She was apprehensive to meet Charlie as well, but that was because Charlie wasn’t asexual and didn’t want anything pressuring her daughter to be who she wasn’t, but Charlie loves Jo and Ellen saw that (so she passed the mom test with flying colors too). Dean was really happy his little sister found the peace that she deserved.

As they were talking other people came, Ash, some other mechanics from the shop, ladies from the diner, and a girl he’s never seen before. Dean checked the time. It was a quarter till five. He wondered why Cas wasn’t back yet and went to put the food out. Everything that needed heating was heated, everything that needed chilling was chilled, and the other stuff was room temperature. He told everybody that the food was ready and they could eat, sit wherever they liked. People lined up for the food. Dean put a playlist of Christmas music on as everyone talked and waited.

The only two people who weren’t in line was Sam and the new girl. Dean walked over to introduce himself, but as he got closer, he could faintly hear what sounded like an intense hushed argument. Before he could make out any words the petite dark-haired woman turned to face Dean with a very unkind look on her face.

“Can I help you?”

Dean was thrown off by the animosity. Did he do something wrong?

Sam quickly tried to amend the situation, “Hey, Dean! What’s up?”

“Uh… nothin’. Just wondering who our guest was. Would you two like a beer?”

“Sounds great.”  The woman faced Sam again and Dean went to fetch two beers. He didn’t understand why the chick was being so rude, but whatever. He’ll be a gracious host and all that bull crap.

When he got back to the pair the woman got on her toes and roughly pulled Sam in for a kiss. Sam was froze for a moment, stunned. When he came to his sense pulled back abruptly, holding her in his like he was restraining her. Despite the rejection she was facing, the woman had the most self-satisfied smirk on her face. She turned to Dean and her smile widened. Sam seeing his brother there for the first time jumped back startled. The woman walked pass Dean, took a beer from his hand, and left out the door.

Dean turned to his brother with a “what the fuck was that look”. Sam just shook his head exasperated as if he was saying “I don’t fucking know, talk about it later” and went off to get food.

At precisely 5 o’clock, Castiel waltzed into the house looking as if he was strutting the red carpet. What the hell?! It was a small town Christmas party! Well maybe not red carpet fancy, but he looked expensive. He had nice dark jeans, a burgundy button-up shirt, and a navy blue blazer. Dean sputtered out the beer he was drinking like an idiot. Quickly, he turned his back to the man praying to whoever was up there that Cas didn’t see him spit up his liquor like a toddler. After wiping his mouth with the back of his hand he turned around, only to come face to face with the bastard.

“Hiya, Cas.”

“Are you alright, Dean? I saw you choking on your drink.”

Of course he fucking saw it. At this point Dean was positive that whatever sadistic celestial being was in control here was using him as personal amusement. He nodded to the actor. “Why are you so late? You were here around three.”

“I went back to the hotel to get ready and took my time. I don’t enjoy getting to things until they’re already underway.”

“Ha! So you like being fashionably late? Bit of a prima donna move, dude.”

Soon they were in a full blown conversation about everything and anything. It was easier than usual, smoother. The actor wasn’t goading Dean and he wasn’t flustered and embarrassing himself. Soon they were talking so long that they decided to sit down. Every now and then other people would join in the conversation, probably recognizing a celebrity and wanting to have some of the action, but Castiel never moved his main focus from Dean and neither did Dean from Castiel. They told jokes, epic stories, had debates, shared opinions, the whole nine yards. In the middle of Cas telling a crazy tale of how he replaced all of the president’s boxers with frilly panties, Dean realized he hadn’t had a slice of pie yet. He told the blue- eyed man to walk with him to the desert table, but there was nothing left. No pie. At all.

“What the actual hell?!” Dean wasn’t sure how the pie could be finished. It was only six or seven- he checked his phone for the time- it was fucking eleven pm. His jaw dropped in disbelief.

“What’s wrong, Dean?” a gentle hand touched Dean’s shoulder. When he looked at the actor his eyes were full of worry.

Dean showed Cas his phone, “We’ve been talking for damn near six hours like a couple of high school girls, man!”

“We can split up and talk to other people if you’d like. There aren’t that many people left though,” Cas said as he gestured around the room and he was right. A lot of people had already gone home. There were Jo and Charlie snuggled together on the sofa giggling and whispering to one another. Then there were Sam, Bobby, and Ellen playing poker at the kitchen table. That was it. Dean couldn’t believe that he’d been so engrossed with Cas that he literally blocked everyone else out and forgot to eat pie. DEAN NEVER FORGOT TO EAT PIE!!!

“You seem a little stressed out. Maybe I should leave as well.”

“No, man! You don’t gotta go, really. Its been good having you around.”

“It was very nice to be around, but I do think I should go still. May I come over another time? Tomorrow maybe?”

“How about I text you?” Dean remembered that he told Cas’ douchebag family that the Christmas party was tomorrow and knowing them they’d come looking for their brother. “Something might come up tomorrow, but yeah, lets definitely hang out. I like you better when you’re not acting like a dick.”

Cas’ eyes took on a teasing light, “I bet you’d like me even better if you had my dick in you.”

“Get out.” Dean dead panned glaring at the man.

“Did I say something wrong?” Cas asked with faked ignorance.

“Get. Out.”

The actor slowly walked towards the door while saying, “Come on Dean. What did I say wrong?” his voice getting a bit louder so everyone can hear him.

“Get the fuck out, Cas.”

When the man was in the doorway he said with an even louder voice, “What, Dean? Was it the part about my di-” before the word could be heard by his family, Dean lunged, closing the door and the man off.

“Goodnight, Cas!” Dean yelled through the shut door.

“Night, Winchester!”

Dean smiled fondly at the closed door. He laughed to himself thinking about what ridiculous bastard the other man was. Soon he heard the start of an engine and tires peeling away down the pavement. Sighing in relief of avoiding a disaster he turned around and came face to face with his family (and Charlie).

“What?” he asked confused.

“My god… I would’ve never thought in a thousand years…” Bobby muttered in utter shock. Ellen mirrored his amazement as she looked at Dean.

Jo was jumping up and down. As if she could no longer contain herself, she sprung into Dean’s arms. He hugged her, but he was at an utter lost. What the hell was happening?!

“He’s so cute! You did good, Dee,” she told him with a nod.

Wait a minute. Did his family think Dean was gay?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... Dean and Cas might be getting a little closer. A lot of good fluff and smut in store for these two in coming chapters! 
> 
> Spring break is almost over so I probably won't be able to pop out chapters as fast as I did the last few. I'm trying to write in advance so there won't be a big delay if things come up.
> 
> Please comment! I love reading them =D


	11. Stars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***WARNING***
> 
> There is reference to past abuse in this chapter and also homophobic language and derogatory slurs.
> 
> If this might trigger anything then please don't read. Although I do want more people to enjoy this story, your mental well being is way more important and I want you to stay safe and healthy.

Dean blinked rapidly at the people before him. His brain was having difficulty computing what was being implied. He removed himself from Jo’s embrace and took tentative steps away from everyone.

“You are aware that Cas is just a friend, right?”

Everyone shot him an incredulous look.

“Come on, guys! He’s ain’t no chick!”

Ellen nodded, “That’s why we’re so surprised. We would’ve never thought…” her sentence drifted on to an unspoken topic that everyone knew, that they would’ve never thought that a child of John Winchester would be gay.

“Don’t worry, Dean. There’s nothing wrong. You can like who you want to like, it’s not a problem,” Jo motioned between herself and Charlie, “look who I love. Its okay.”

“For you.”

Confusion flashed across her face. “What?”

Dean echoes his statement, “For you. It’s okay for you. And for Charlie. And even for Cas, but ME?! No way… I am not homo.”

“We’re not saying you’re homosexual,” Charlie amended.

“It sure as hell sounds like it!” his voice was rising. Panic was over taking his emotions. Was he gay? He couldn’t fucking deny he might have some feelings for C- no! He could definitely fucking deny it. What the hell was happening to him? Could liking guys really be contagious or something like his dad said. His eyes searched Sam’s. Sam had to know he wasn’t into that, right? “Sammy?”

“Um… Yes?”

“Tell me something, Sammy. You don’t think that I’m- you know… do ya?”

“Well, you’ve never acted that way with anyone before except Lisa. When you talked to her it was like the two of you encompassed the world. You never saw anyone else when you were with her. We thought you two were going to get married. That’s kind of how you were with Castiel,” Sam rubbed his hand nervously down his pants, “you even forgot to eat pie… dude that’s big.”

Dean’s world was crashing down around him. Could he really like Cas? In THAT way? The man did have the most beautiful eyes he’s ever seen… the intensity those eyes sometimes felt as if they were ripping off his clothes and revealing all his nakedness- no. It was more… intimate. They weren’t just ripping off his clothes, but it was as if they were peeling away all the bullshit and the lies that made up this persona that he’s grown into. They simply peered into Dean’s exposed soul, truly seeing him. His mind wandered to the seemingly innocent touches that just grounded him. The hands massaging him in the car, on his thigh in the diner, and even tonight that simple touch on the shoulder erasing some of his anxiety. He thought about many things, the actor’s personality, his smile, his charisma, the underlined quirkiness to everything he did, the- fuck… Dean was in some deep shit.

He made a beeline for his keys on the key rack and left out the house into his car. The comforting feel of familiarity giving him a brief respite of peace before driving away onto the empty streets.

Back in the house, the family stood in place with varying emotions playing on their face. Ellen with concern, Bobby with disbelief, Sam with confusion, and Jo’s face with a look of pure hurt. Everyone looking at the door, left ajar from his hasty retreat. Charlie was the only one to break the silence.

“Man… never seen someone that far in a closet since the Narnia movies.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel lounged on the back of his car looking up at the stars. He parked on a bank of land near the river. The bridge that went to the small town was in the distance. There were no streetlights, no cars on the road, his own car blending into the darkness around him, the town across the river where his hotel was echoed the same blackness excluding one or two establishments with their lights on. Some might describe it as gloomy or spooky, but Castiel thought it was wonderful. The dark brought out the stars. So he sat there on the back of his car, determined to bring in the Christmas day with the glimmer of the celestial bodies in the night sky.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

** December 24th, 1994 **

“Jimmy! What are we doing? We should go back inside before we get in trouble,” Castiel whined to his twin.

Jimmy kept moving forward. The light of the Angell mansion getting further and further away. They were walking across the vast yard behind the home, after about 100 yards they were climbing a hill. Castiel puffed and groaned the entire time, trying to tell his twin how it was late and they needed to go back to bed before anyone caught them, but Jimmy, with a hand wrapped around his brother’s wrist, lugged Castiel up the hill. When they got to the top Jimmy spread a blanket over the manicured grass and sat on it. With a roll of his eyes Castiel took a seat as well.

“What are we doing up here?” Castiel asked miserably as his body quaked from the cool air.

“We’re watching the stars.”

“But, why here? We could do that from our room.”

“Cassie…” Jimmy took his brother’s hand in his, “I want to bring in Christmas Day with you. Not anyone else. Not those fake people back there who pretend like they’re our family. Just the two of us.”

“They’re not that bad.”

“They’re horrible! They think they are so superior to everyone! And you’re shivering out here? Well I shiver in there. The temperature might be fine, but the people are so cold to us, Cassie. I hate it. I want mom.”

Castiel nodded in agreement. He did miss their mother very much and ever since the government relocated them to the father they never met, to live in his home with his children, it has been very hard. Everyone thought they were a burden and despite their smiling faces, it was obvious how much of a chore they were.

The two 10 year olds held each other tightly as they gazed up at the stars. Jimmy checked the watch that they stole from their father. It read that there was 15 more minutes till Christmas day and they sat there in silence, enjoying the night together.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tears filled Castiel’s eyes blurring the lights above him. He left them overflow and fall in streams down his cheeks. His lips twitched into a fond smile, remembering how he use to always bring wait for Christmas day to arrive together with his twin. He longed for them everyday, but it was moments like these, when he was alone, reenacting memories of their times together, that he was able to let everything go.

“Oh, Jolie… my beautiful sister… I wish you were here with me now.”

Cas continued to look up at the sky. Checking the time he found that there was only 15 more minutes till midnight. He close his eyes, letting his senses take in the environment around him. The feel of the crisp air, the smell of the river, the- shrieking of tires broke him out of his reverie. He sat up on the trunk and looked behind him at the road. A black car was driving down the pavement in reckless and jerky movements. Castiel looked on in annoyance. He hated drunk drivers. He wished that there was an officer nearby to arrest the dimwitted person putting others at risk. As he watched the car come up the road he soon realized that he recognized it. Although he couldn’t see it perfectly, as it passed the spot where he parked he saw the outline. It was very much like the one he saw outside of Dean’s house. The car turned abruptly onto the same bank of land Castiel was, but closer to the bridge. It almost went headlong into the river, but stopped a second earlier. Castiel’s heart jumped at the site of the near disaster.

“Fuck!” a drunken voice called out as a figure fell out of the driver’s door onto the chilled ground. “Fuck!” the man sounded again he stood up, bottle of whiskey in his hand, and slammed the door.

Castiel looked on with bewilderment as Dean Winchester downed the bottle, throwing it angrily into the lake, only to open the trunk and retrieve another one identical to the last. This had to be stopped. He was scared that the drunken mechanic would accidently drown himself or get back into his car and injure someone else. Castiel got down from his trunk and began walking toward the man who had his back turned to him. The closer he got, the more he could make out things he was muttering.

“What the fuck is wrong with me? There has to be something wrong with me. I- I can’t want him… what the fuck Winchester… you like girls not dudes,” he leaned his head on one arm on the top of the car. The bottle hanging loosely from his other hand.

Castiel briefly considered if he should make his presence known to Dean. Should he call out to him? Ask him if he was alright? He knows that the words he heard from Dean were not meant for his ears. Should he quietly go back to his car and pretend he was never there?

Castiel jumped as Dean kicked the tire of his car with such anger he could feel the rage from where he stood. The green-eyed man spoke in a mocking voice as if he was impersonating someone, “You’re useless, Dean! A good for nothing faggot! You like being a little sissy, don’t ya?! Like crying there on the floor like a little girl?!?! Well I’ll give you a fucking reason to cry!!!” he kicked the tire harder and faster. Castiel hoped he had shoes that would keep his foot from injury. “You’re no fucking son of mine! Your mother would hate you!!! She loved God and son… you’re an abomination. You’re telling me you like, girls? Do you think I fucking believe you? Huh?!?!?! ANSWER ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stop crying you queerfuck! I don’t give a fuck if you’re bleeding dammit!!! Boys don’t cry.” Dean ended his rant by breaking the breaking the bottle over the hood of the car.

Castiel’s mind could so vividly see what Dean was acting out. He could imagine a younger version of him, a boy, replacing the car. He saw the young Dean Winchester curled up in a ball at the feet of a drunken enraged man. The young boy crying profusely, calling out for his father to stop, trying to defend himself from the allegations being hurled at him. The man kicking the child over and over again till the point where the child was bleeding and bruise, possibly having broken bones. He saw the man finally raising the bottle that had drained him of his sanity and breaking it over the body of the battered boy. Bile filled Castiel’s stomach. He wanted to throw up. He prayed that his imagination was just running wild, but one look at the broken man crying on the car told him he had gotten it right.

Castiel took a few tentative steps forward, but being unsure how to proceed, he kept his distance.

“Fucking Castiel… had to be homo… had to screw up my head.”

“Actually, Dean, I’m bisexual.” Somehow Cas found his voice. He watched as the man before him tensed at the sound of another person with him. He kept his back to Castiel.

“Hey, Cas. How long you’ve been standing there?” Dean’s voice trembled as he was trying to tuck his emotions away.

“Long enough. Dean, you’re drunk. Let me take you home.”

Dean stood up and faced the river, tears still streaming down his face. “You know… I use to come here every time after my dad was on one of his drunken rampages. I’d come here and think how easy it would be to just end it all. I use to have a gun that I could use or I could just drive the car in and drown myself, but then there was Sammy and there was no way in hell I was going to leave him alone with that bastard… no fucking way,” he looked at Castiel, his eyes full of turmoil and pain.

“Dean-”

“I’m sure you heard what I said. You know that I- I… fuck man…” the hatred was evident on his face as his sentence drifted off into the air. Not hatred for Castiel, but self- loathing. “I’m a little bit into you, okay?! Apparently everyone else knows it too. Fuck!”

“There’s nothing wrong with liking who you like Dean. I’m sure they understand-”

“Fuck, Cas! It has nothing to do with them. They’re fine with it. I’m just a fucking Winchester and we ain’t gay. Case close.”

Castiel carefully approached the man. When he was near enough, he reached out slowly, making his intentions clear, and held him. Dean relaxed into his hold, reaching out with his own hands, grabbing Cas’ shoulders as if they were his life support and at the moment, they truly were.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am very bad with emotional stuff. Hopefully you all enjoyed the chapter and the destiel angst in it. I'm trying to keep on top of my writing and not have such a long break like before.
> 
> Thanks for all those who continue to comment and leave kudos on the fic. You all have very special places in my heart!
> 
> Thanks for reading =D


	12. Aftermath

Dean woke, the sunlight from his window dragging him from sleep. He rubbed his eyes. He felt the consequences of last night hit him full force. The hangover was terrible. He was drenched in sweat, his bed and covers feeling sickly moist. There was a constant beating throb behind his skull as if his head was in the inner trappings of a bass drum (don’t ask how he knew what that was like).

“Fuck…” he groaned, shielding his eyes from the light streaming in his room. His mouth felt as if it were stuffed with cotton. Next to his bed, there was a bottle of water, a box of Club crackers, and aspirin. Dean silently thanked modern medicine as he popped in two pills and gulped down the water. Shakily, he got to his feet to close the blinds. On the window was a note.

“Knew the sunlight would kill ya, that’s what you get for

being an asshole and driving around under the influence.

If it wasn’t for Castiel dropping your unconscious butt back

home, then you could be dead in the river.

Anyway… I’m sure Bobby and I will chew you out when we get back.

Went out for a supply run and will be back later.

Eat your crackers, drink the water.

Also, call Castiel because you owe him a huge thank you.

~ Sam”

Cas? What did Cas have anything to do with him getting back home? Last thing Dean remembered was storming out of the house, breaking into Ellen’s bar, and downing a shit load of alcohol really fast. All Dean wanted to do was get super drunk and drown out all the Cas bull that was making him question everything. After that… he went to river… the same place he went after every time his dad beat him growing up. How was Cas involved? He didn’t… No… No no no no no no!!!!!!!!! Dean lunged for his phone and called the actor.

“Hello, Dean. Are you feeling better?” a gruff voice asked from the other end of the line.

“Cas… please tell me that last night didn’t happen.”

“What are you referring to?”

“Just tell me what you remember.”

Cas went on to describe watching the stars from the back of his car on the river bank. Told him how he saw Dean almost driving into the river. Saw him drunkenly reenacting his father’s punishments. Heard him admit his feelings. Held him in his arms tightly as he sobbed into his shirt until he passed out on his shoulder and then proceeded to drive him back to his home.

Dean wished he had drove into that river. Would’ve saved himself a butt load of embarrassment. After Cas painted the scene that matched the picture from Dean’s hazy memory the conversation drifted into silence. The dead air made Dean anxious. He wanted to say something, but the words were nowhere to be found.

“Dean? Would you like me to come over today?”

“Um… I don’t know-”

“We should talk.”

“I- I know. I just-” he sentence was interrupted by a ring of the doorbell. Confused at who it could be he went through the list of possible people. Bobby and Sam would walk right in. Ellen or Jo would come in through the back. The only other people that might- crap!

“Hey, dude! Um… we should talk about this another time. I gotta go!”

“But, Dean-”

“Bye!” he hurriedly ended the call and ran to the door. Opening it he came face to face with Michael Angell.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel looked at his phone with confusion. The whole thing was very odd. He was at a crossroads. Either he purses the man or he waits for Dean to come to him. If he stuck to his original plan, he would wait for Dean to be lost in a fog of disorienting anxiety and curiosity, causing the man to ultimately come to him, giving Castiel the perfect opportunity to seduce him into being a new trinket. Or he could go after him. Dean was going through a lot. The emotional turmoil that he saw the night before was mind blowing. The best thing for him would be to help him through these feelings, to be there for him as a friend, and make sure he didn’t do anything stupid. Dean admitted to being suicidal before. The last thing Castel wants is for him to go back to that dark place and from the rate that he is destroying himself over the prospect of not being as heterosexual as he thought, it seems like he might very well end up back on that precipice.

With a sigh, he raked his hands through his hair. He was developing feelings for the mechanic. He never got attached. Sex was a recreational activity, there was no room for bonding. There wasn’t even sex involved yet and he was actually liking the man. It was never supposed to escalate pass aesthetic attraction. His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on his hotel room door.

“Hello, Naomi,” he said to the dark haired woman as he opened the door.

“Castiel.”

He walked back to the bed he was reclining on and propped himself up against the pillows, leaving the door open. Naomi walked in after him, closing the door. She took a seat at a desk near the bed. Castiel thought of how a sister might usually react in this situation. Jolie would’ve thrown herself on the bed next to her brother or even sat on his legs or some other silliness, but Naomi seemed all business, per her usual self. It didn’t surprise him. Wasn’t like the woman was really his sister.

“I’m surprised that you’re not tapping away at your phone or taking out your laptop.”

“You know I make time for important people, Castiel. You are family, not like those other insignificant people,” she replied warmly. The thing about Naomi Angell was that she didn’t fake emotion like her other siblings, instead she simply chose to show it to people she deemed worthy.

“Because of my success,” he said, filling in the condition she hadn’t spoken.

“Yes. You proved yourself to be an Angell with your success and intellect. That’s why you should reconcile with your family. We very much want you to return.”

“You know I can’t do that, Naomi.”

“You are limiting yourself, Castiel. Michael wants you to come home.”

Castiel rolled his eyes, asking exasperated, “Why do you always listen to Michael?”

“It’s the right thing to do-”

“Michael isn’t God, Naomi! He’s an egotistical bastard. One of the biggest hypocrites to walk the Earth. People thought Augustus Caesar was full of himself? You should introduce them to your brother.”

“He has his flaws, yes, but he also has father’s will. He knows what he wants and we must be loyal to him. Don’t you have any sense of loyalty?”

“Yes… I am very loyal to my family. My real one.”

“You mean you’re dead one.”

Castiel clenched his fists. He hated the Angells, but he never had much of an issue with Naomi. She was easy to ignore. Now, however, he wanted more then to give her a good tongue lashing. It seems like she has been spending too much time with her brothers.

“I am concerned about you, brother,” looking into her eyes, he saw genuine concern. She continued, “You are letting irrelevant people influence you. Your mother and… sibling… are dead and not of importance. Now, you seem to have a growing interest in this Winchester boy. There is nothing you can gain from him. A relationship there would be very unprofitable.”

“It’s just an experiment. Something to do to keep me from getting bored,” he was trying to convince himself of that more than her.

“Castiel. You are aware of the doctorates I have in psychology, anthropology, and sociology. You know I know how to read people very well and how to manipulate them if I choose to do so. Your relationship with Dean Winchester is not leading to having another member in your ridiculous sex club. What is developing between you is not that superficial and the faster you see that the better.”

An idea suddenly popped into his head. There was no way that Naomi would come to him out of the blue like this. She had mistakenly reminded Cas that although she did often blend into the background, she was a very good manipulator. Did Michael send her?

“Why are you here, Naomi?”

Her lips spread into a satisfied smile, “I was curious to see how long it took you…”

“Naomi,” his tone full of warning.

“Michael is with Dean. I needed to make sure that-”

Before she could even finish her sentence Castiel was out the door running barefoot, shoes and keys in hand, racing to his car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you once more to all those who comment and enjoy the story! You all mean so much to me it isn't even funny! 
> 
> Sorry for the slow chapter, but I needed a transition to what's coming up next ;)


	13. Closer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoy the story!

Castiel needed to get to Dean. He didn’t know why, but he just had to. He didn’t think any harm would come to Dean, but there was just something off about the entire situation. Why would Naomi go so far as to act as a decoy? What did Michael want? Did it have to do with Castiel or with this interest that Michael apparently has in Dean? Thinking about the prospect of Michael being attracted to Dean made Cas’ grip on the steering wheel tighten. Was he jealous? Cursing under his breath, he sees a pursuing squad car in his rearview mirror. Briefly considering and dismissing the idea of taking his chances with a chase, he pulls over.

“Afternoon, officer!” he greets the woman with a charming smile.

She nods in acknowledgement of his greeting, “License and registration.”

“Well… deputy-”

“Sheriff.”

Internally kicking himself, Cas continued his original thought, “My apologies sheriff. My name is Castiel Novak, I was just on my way to a friend’s house. I left my script there. I’m actually a Hollywood actor.”

“Well, hello Castiel Novak. I recognize you from your subpar movies. Are you aware you were going over 70 in a 40 zone?”

This conversation wasn’t going as smooth as usual. At this point, the officer should be asking for an autograph and letting him off with a warning, but not this woman. Slipping on a mask of contrition he nodded, “I am so sorry, ma’am. I’m just in a hurry.”

“I can tell. License and registration please.”

Retrieving the information and handing it over, Castiel dialed back up his charm, “Is this really necessary? I am sorry. I’ll be sure not to make the same mistake.”

She smiled warmly, “I’ll tell you what… You’re obviously in a rush and trying your best to get out of a ticket so I’ll just walk over to my car and take my sweet sweet time, running these through the system and getting your ticket. Alright?”

Slumping in his seat with resignation, he nodded solemnly. The woman walked back to her car a bit too slow for his taste. Never had Castiel been in such a place where people weren’t falling over backwards for him. He would find the sheriff a refreshing change of pace if he didn’t have to be somewhere. Looking back in his rearview he saw the woman sitting in her seat, simply staring at him, not doing anything, but wasting time.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Michael had walked passed Dean when he answered the door, making himself home. That was about 20 minutes ago. Now he was chatting with Dean as if they were best friends. It was hard to remember how much of a crapwad the man was, but at times, as if a glint of a zipper keeping his disguise together, cracks in his pretense would remind Dean not to trust any shit that came out this man’s mouth. He would ask Dean things like “What are you aspirations?” and Dean would drawl “Things are pretty good. I don’t need all that much in life.” Then another question like “Your brother is trying to become a lawyer, is he not?” and the response would be “Yup! That’s Sammy! Always been the brains around here.” And they went on like that the whole time, until now.

“Alright, Dean. Let’s get down to the nitty gritty.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Mr. Angell.”

“Listen. I know a BS fest when I see one. We are both masquerading as the people we think the other wants to see, but I didn’t come here for that. I know you lied to me and gave me the wrong date that my brother was going to be here.”

“Alright. Then there’s no reason for you to stay,” Dean said with a dismissive tone. The faster he could get this guy out the better. He would hate if Sam and Bobby came home and got dragged into this nonsense.

After a couple beats, Michael wordlessly got up from his seat and walked deeper into the house. Dean stared after him in shocked horror as the man walked to his room as if he knew the way by heart. This was the first time that Michael has been inside his home or it should’ve been, yet the man knew exactly where to go. Taking a deep breath, he followed after him into the bedroom.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel began to bang his head on the steering wheel in frustration. How did he manage to piss off the sheriff so much that she would subject him to such torture? How long had Michael been there? If he got there as soon as the call between them ended, then it would be approximately 35 minutes. He tried calling, but Dean’s phone went straight to voicemail. He even tried calling Michael, but all he got in response was a winking emoji text message from the bastard. Seeing that he was still going to be stuck here for some more time he decided to call one more person.

“Hey, Cas! Can I call you Cas?” the voice asked.

“Yes, Sam. It’s not a problem. May I speak with your brother?”

“Um… actually I’m not home. Bobby and I are about to finish up soon, but Dean should be there by himself.”

“I see…”

“Is there something wrong?”

“I just wanted to make sure he was alright in the aftermath of last night. His phone is going to voicemail.”

“Well, I’ll tell him to give you a ring when we get home. What did happen though, Cas? What happened last night?” the worry was evident in Sam’s voice. Was he aware of Dean’s internal struggles as well?

“I’m sorry, Sam, but I believe that information is for your brother to disclose.”

“Yeah man. I get it. We should be home in about half an hour. I’ll make sure Dean calls you then.”

“Thank you, Sam.” With that last sentiment the call ended. His gaze returning back to his rearview mirror confirmed that the woman was stepping out of her cruiser and walking back towards him. A relieve exhale left his lips.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dean’s breathing almost stopped at the sight of Michael Angell so casually reclining on his bed. Something about the situation reminded him of a snake coiled in lax spiral. The posture made it seem indifferent or harmless, but the air around it made it evident that the reptile wanted to strike. Wary of the other man, Dean slowly crossed the threshold.

“Why don’t you join me over here?” Michael said patting the spot on the bed next to him.

“Listen, I don’t know what you’re playing, but you need to leave me out of it. If you got some beef with Cas then just handle it like grown men and get over it.”

“Who says I’m here for little Castiel?” Leaving the bed in a flash, Michael crowded Dean in a corner. Leaning in close, he whispers “Who’s to say I’m not here for you?”

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel finally pulled up the house. Running up to the front door in a haste, not even bothering with turning off his car. Before he could reach out and test the handle, the door swung open. In the doorway stood Michael, seemingly very satisfied with himself.

“Excuse me little brother. I wish we could catch up, but our sister and I have a flight waiting on us,” he mused. He stood there, waiting on Castiel to move. Michael was never the type of man to move around someone… Everyone had to make room for him.

Castiel stood just as stock still, staring the man down. The fire in his belly threatening to consume everything in its path. His cognizant mind giving way to a red haze. He was sure that some sort of bodily harm would come upon Michael. What had he done to Dean? Did he fill his head with lies? Did he cause him to self-doubt? Did he hurt him? Touch him?

“Winchester. Call your guard dog off.”

Dean materialized behind Michael. He fixed Castiel with a look devoid of all the warmth that had originally drawn him to the man. The cold way he stared at him almost mirrored Michael’s, causing him to shiver. “Cas, get out of the way. I’m trying to show my guest out the door.”

There was a feeling of being doused with cold water that shocked Castiel. His burning replaced with numbness. Stepping to the side, Michael strode pass him and to his car. He waved to Dean, who in turn half-heartedly waved back. Castiel stood watching as the vehicle made its way into the distance. He knew he should move or at least say something, but he seemed glued to his spot. Was it nerves? Castiel hadn’t experienced nerves in a long time.

With a sigh, Dean stepped outside his home, closing the door behind him. Without a second glance at Castiel, he made his way into the rows of the junkyard. Before Cas could ask himself whether it was a good idea to go after him, his feet were moving, following. Castiel was soon behind Dean, his eyes were burning into the back of the man’s head, silently imploring him to turn around and confide in him what Michael had done. He got half his wish granted. Dean spun around suddenly and squared a punch straight to his jaw. The momentum of the rash attack spun Castiel around and knocked him to the ground. He looked at the ground beneath him, his vision unsteady as drops of his blood splattered on the dirt floor. Whipping his head back to Dean’s, he searched the other man’s face. He was no longer met with a cold gaze, but those green passionate eyes were burning with rage and grief and the tears of a man who was betrayed slipped down his cheeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun duuuuuun!!!!!!! What did Michael tell Dean?!?! Did he hurt him?! Threaten Sam???? Or maybe brought to light some of Castiel's secrets... How will our precious couples get pass this hurdle?!?!?! The world may never know!!!!!!
> 
> Well... I guess the world will know eventually unless I just stop posting or die or something. I'm going to try my best to be on top of updates, but things are getting a bit crazy with finals coming at the end of the month. Wish me good luck!


	14. What Was Said

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for being patient with me guys. I apologize for the long wait. Finals are almost here and things have been crazy. 
> 
> But... wait till you find out what Michael said to Dean! Are you ready???

“Fuck!!!” Dean cried out, both hands combing through his hair. He didn’t even bother to wipe the tears streaming down his face. He wanted Cas to see his pain… the fucking pain he caused. He watched as the other man’s blood spatter on the ground, mingling with the dust. All he wants is for Cas to be as pissed off as him. Dean wants a fights. But when that blue-eyed gaze turned on him, devoid of any animosity, his heart melted. He had to look away from them. “Don’t you fucking look at me like that!”

“Dean… I don’t understand. Let me help you. What did Michael do?”

“What did Michael do? Are you serious, Cas?”

“O- Of course… this isn’t a joking matter…”

“That’s not what I-” sighing, Dean turned back towards the man. All he saw were fierce glacial eyes. He shivered. Not because there was a coldness in them, but because there was surreal beauty that seemed to dwarf him. Not in a belittling way that made him want to run, but in a way that was comforting, promising sweet refuge. It took all his will to not drop to his knees and weep in the man’s arms. He couldn’t though. Castiel was a liar. He saw that now. He stared at the man in silence. Fixing his face into a grim mask.

“Dean? Dean don’t hide from me.” Castiel got to his feet. He was hesitant to approach Dean. He should be too. He’d have another fist shoved in his pretty boy face if he got too close.

They stood watching one another. Castiel’s stare continued to be imploring. All awhile, a war was raging inside Dean. Part of him, his heart, was crying out for the man before him. Was telling Dean to forget about what Michael told him and explore the possibilities of a future with Cas. But then… his mind was on the defense. He heard the facts, when he didn’t believe it he saw the photos and… that video… that god awful video. Dean still had the taste of bile in his mouth from trying to keep down those crackers he ate. Cas was a threat.

“Cas… um… I don’t think we should see each other anymore.”

“Dean-”

“Please! Don’t talk,” his voice was strained with effort. It was hard enough to get the words out as it was. He didn’t need the dude sweet talking him. “Listen. I don’t know what kind of sick shit that you’re into, but I want none of it. Stay away from me and my family. Leave us alone. You don’t have to worry about me contacting the authorities. I- I won’t tell anyone what you- uh… what you do…”

“Dean… what are you talking about?! What lies did Michael tell you?”

“Don’t play dumb, Cas. I saw the pictures and that fucking video. I don’t know if you’re doing this alone or if you’re part of some organization. Please, I won’t tell anyone. You don’t have to keep me quiet or anything. I don’t want trouble. Just… please leave me alone,” his voice cracked on the last word. The last thing he wanted to be was alone again, Lisa’s rejection still burned to his core, but he wasn’t going to find anything good with a sociopath like Cas. He was fucking sure of that much. Walking around Cas, he gave the man a wide berth before walking hastily back to the house.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel stood in the spot where Dean left him. His brows were furrowed in confusion and utter befuddlement. He stood there frozen in place. Minutes passed as he reflected on the conversation. He couldn’t wrap his head around what Michael could have said to Dean.

“What the hell was that?”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

***5 Months Later***

“Omygod! I got sand in my bikini! My wet dripping cunt is drying out! What should I do?”

“Don’t worry, baby doll. I got this.”

Dean continued to watch as the buff college jock licked all the sand out of the bimbo blonde’s vagina. His room was filled with the moans and high pitch yips of the girl’s cries. The logic was freaking ridiculous, but that’s porn for you. He watched on as she squirm on the beach. Giant breast bouncing everywhere. Her head flung back. He’s seen this video a couple times already. When he was younger, this porno would always get him to full mast. She grabbed his hair and humped his face like a woman possessed. Dean vaguely thought of how awesome the chick’s abs must be to hold that position with her back off the sand for such a long period of time. Her cries were getting louder and louder. The “fuck yes”s that she was saying turned into screams of “oh fuck” a she supposedly neared her orgasm. Her eyes rolled into the back of head as she climaxed. Falling on her back with a thump, her eyelids fluttering. The jock hovered over her, face slicked with her juices. Dean said the next line mockingly with the guy “Looks like you just got sand in your ass, babe. Don’t worry. I got this.”

Dean closed his laptop with a sigh and set it besides him. He stared daggers at his penis. The stupid thing won’t do anything! Months… it’s been months since he’s been able to cum. He’s tried everything. He’s tried masturbating, nothing. Watching porn, nothing. Being with women, fucking nothing. If things don’t change, he’s going to be known as the guy who just can’t get it up. The only time his dick takes the least bit of interest in something is when that blue-eyed asshat pops in his head. Picturing those plump full lips sucking his cock down as those blue eyes burned ferociously. Imagining how helpless he’d feel in that gaze, how utterly controlled. Then Dean’s penis would start to flush and grow, but Dean always stopped it there. Castiel was not someone he should be thinking about. At all. With a groan Dean rolled off his bed and walked to the bathroom to take a cold shower. He had to get out of the house.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel smirked at the man before him. He leaned into the crook of his neck. Nuzzling the skin with love, leaving little nips along the curve. The other man’s breath grew heavy as he relaxed into Castiel’s arms. Castiel climbed over the man, trapping his waist between his legs, he gently laid him back against the pillows on the bed they were on. Cupping the man’s face tenderly in his hands, Castiel looked down at him with awe. This was the man he wants to spend the rest of his life with. The man that his heart yearns for. He felt his emotions swell up within him. He didn’t care about his past. He didn’t care about the demons raging inside of him. He just cared about this man and this moment. Tear stung his eyes as he gazed into fellow blue orbs. The man smiled back adoringly.

“Are you just going to admire my beauty or are you going to kiss me?” the man asked, humor lacing his words.

Smiling, Castiel ducked down and kissed the other man passionately. His hands gliding up to grip the man’s hair as he licked possessively into the other mouth.

“CUT!!!” Gabriel yelled. Castiel abruptly rolled off the bed and strode over to his chair.

Balthazar sat up, rubbing his scalp with a scowl on his face, “Damn, Castiel! I knew you were a kinky bastard, but that doesn’t mean you had to try to rip my hair out.”

“Well, from all of the stories you’ve told me of you sexual endeavors, I just thought you liked it rough,” Cas said with a smirk playing on his lips.

The other man rolled his eyes and looked at Gabe, “Please tell me that was good. I’d hate to go yet another round with little Cassie again.”

Gabriel smiled at them as he watched the replayed footage, “Pure gold, guys! You’re good to head out.”

Castiel and Balthazar sat beside each other as the makeup artists went to work with cleaning their face. Balthazar made small talk, charming the women as usual. Castiel on the other hand just sat there, feeling numb. He made witty remarks when he needed to. Smiled, laughed, and nodded when necessary. Then left for his hotel room. There was no joy in day to day life. No satisfaction or excitement. Simply nothingness.

Upon arriving to his room, Castiel laid on the bed. He spent some time staring at the ceiling. Something that he was doing more and more these days. He kept racking his mind about what Michael could’ve possibly have said to Dean for him to have reacted in the way he did. Groaning with frustration, he took out his phone and opened up Dean’s colorguard performance. His heart ached for the amazing creature effortlessly floating around the field. He turned off the video with a huff and put his shoes back on. He really needed some air.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... yeah... you actually have to wait to find out what Michael told Dean. I wonder what it was? Don't worry, Cas is really agonizing over it too. It'll all come to light soon.
> 
> But like I said before, finals are still ruining my life currently. The semester is almost over though which is awesome, but then the summer semester is right around the corner. I'm going to try to keep going for you guys since a few of you kinda like the story ;)
> 
> Thanks for reading and leaving comments. Honestly, though... I LIVE for your comments!


	15. Together Again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry sorry sorry sorry!!!!!!! I feel so bad for not updating in a while! Please don't hate me!

Dean was stretched out on the hood of his car, luxuriating in the sun. He always preferred the warmer temperature to the winter and with the summer around the corner, he could finally enjoy it. Closing his eyes, he hums from his spot opposite from the town. The tune “Sittin’ on the Dock of the Bay” playing in his mind, the sound of the river luring him into peacefulness.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel stood behind the Impala. Breath trapped in his throat. He briefly wondered why his vision was obscured before the realization hit him… he was crying. After all this time of feeling numb he finally felt emotion and all it took was one look at Dean Winchester to rip his heart out. Of course he could only see the top of the man’s head, but he that could change so easily. All he had to do was take a few steps and- no… Dean was clear with his wishes. Cas knew that all he would do is upset the man if he were to appear in his line of vision. He was surprised that he got this close as it was. Close enough to touch the back of the Impala. Close enough to hear that sweet voice humming blithely. Close enough for his soul to rip itself apart. He covered his mouth as a shaky breath rushed out his mouth. Slowly, he walked away, back down the road, distancing himself physically from the mechanic, yet failing to do so in his heart.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

He laid there for a while. Soaking in the vitamin D and such. He laid there until the bright hazy light that snuck into his closed eyes dimmed to a dull glow. The heat of the day slowly melting away to the cool of the evening. Dean sighed as he sat up on the car. Looking over the bridge his eyes drifted to the hotel that Cas was staying at.

“Fuck this!” Dean slid off the car. He couldn’t handle this shit. Cas had awoken these feelings in him and he had no fucking idea what to do with them. It wasn’t even like he was lusting after every good looking guy that walked his way, but he was just lusting after Castiel. Not even lusting… Dean knew lust. He knew it with Cassie, his first. Although he had kissed plenty of girls and had dozens of make out sessions before, it wasn’t until those beautiful dark eyes of hers seduced him, those luscious lips gently caressing the nape of his neck, and the way she manhandled him... The ferocity of her spirit made his brain short-circuit. For a while there he thought that he actually loved her. Then there was Carmen Porter, the cutie who looked like she came straight from a beer ad. Bela was a sexy little minx too despite how short their relationship lasted. And he could never forget Rhonda Hurley. She brought Dean to places he never though existed. Yet in all those memorable relationships and the hookups in between, he never once had anything but lust for those women. Sure he cared for them. He even befriended some of them. But there was no real romantic connection. Not until Lisa… and even she just started out as another pretty face before she managed to worm her way into his heart. But Cas was different. There was lust there, no denying that. But there was a weird familiarity, trust. Their bond was like nothing Dean had ever experience and it happened so quickly, effecting him so deeply. It’s been over 5 months since he cut ties with the man and the wound was still fresh. Maybe he should’ve confronted him instead of running away.

“Dean Winchester… what the hell is wrong with you… falling in love with a psychopath… how fucking clichéd,” he huffed to himself as he tapped away at his cell phone.

The call was answered on the first ring. “Dean! Thank God you called.”

The unrestrained relief at the other end of the line made Dean smiled. At least he’s not the only one going crazy during this time, Cas was just as worried as he was. “Yeah, um, hiya Cas. I ‘ve been doing some thinking and it’s time you and I had a little chat.”

“I’m happy to hear those words from you. I’ve given up hope at this point. Should I come to your home?”

“No!!!” Dean mentally kicked himself. He didn’t want Cas to know how scared he was, but there was no way in hell he was going to do this in private. It was bad enough that the potential sociopath knew where he lived. “Um… no… How about the diner. We could go a hour or two before closing. There shouldn’t be a crowd or anything.”

“Alright… is today okay?”

“Yeah. Meet you there at 8?”

“Definitely.” With that last word the line went dead.

Dean got in his car and drove back to his home. He had an hour to kill and some preparing to do.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel ended the call, but continued to stare at the phone in shock. Had Dean really just called him? Was he dreaming? It wasn’t until he felt the rough grind of teeth on his dick that he was brought back to reality.

“Ah! Tina, you know better than to use teeth!” he scowled at the bright grey eyes below him.

She came off his penis with a pop. Smirking, she said “Sorry sir… you just had that ‘Am I dreaming? Someone pinch me’ look. Just trying to be helpful.”

Castiel smiled warmly at the woman. “You’re being particularly rebellious today. Have I not punished you enough lately?”

“Well, you have dropped the ball a bit. Being distracted by the loss of your soulmate and all.”

Castiel contemplated that statement as he walked over to a drawer on the other side of the room. He had been distracted for the past couple of months. He even narrowed his selection pool of subs to just Tina. He didn’t want to hurt any of them by having his mind someplace else and with Tina he could afford a bit of wiggle room in his attention. They knew each other very well at this point of their relationship. He shuffled through the drawer and found a flogger.

“Tina… you have been so patient with me this whole time. I’m very thankful for your companionship.”

“You were there for me when I needed you. It’s the least I can do.”

 Castiel knelt down before her. Hands coming up to massage her scalp. “Please forgive me for breaking the scene. I shouldn’t have answered the call.”

“Castiel… I know you needed that call. Don’t worry about me. Go get ready for your man.”

His hands cupped her face as he looked at her lovingly. His lips brush at her temple before saying, “I will, but first let me make it up to you. I’ve been a horrible dom. Let me start again. I think I can get a few more orgasms out of you”

She nods her head. Castiel stands up abruptly. Looking down coldly at Tina. Tangling his fingers in her curls he yanks her head back roughly. “What did I tell you about using your teeth?! Whores like you need to learn their fucking place!”

“I’m so sorry, sir! I-”

Before she could finish her plea, a dick was pushing into her open mouth all the way to the back of her throat. Tears sprung from her eyes immediately as her air passage was blocked. Castiel held her there as he raise his hand and still clutching the flogger, he brought it down quickly on her naked backside.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dean sat in a lone booth near the back of the diner. To his utter surprise and disappointment, the joint was empty. He expected… no… he hoped that there would be a few other people there, but there might as well be a tumble weed blowing through. The loneliness did nothing for his nerves. He kept glancing at the door. The only noise was the clinking of pots in the kitchen. The waitress was behind the counter with her nose in a book, waiting for any late night customers or for Dean to actually order something. She was quiet. Too quiet. Everything was too fucking quiet! Everything but his heart. He could practically hear it thumping, acutely aware of the blood rushing in his ears. And then there were the thoughts. The ones that kept flashing behind his eyelids every time he closed them. The bag of Michael’s “evidence” seemed to weigh a ton on his lap.

He was distracted from his anxieties by the chime of the door. Looking up he saw a cute petite woman step in. Her hair was a sophisticated chaos. Black and midnight blue ringlets shooting off into various directions. Her skin was rich, radiant, golden. Dean felt punched in the face by her beauty. From where he was sitting he could barely make out intense grey eyes. They seemed to sparkle when she turned them his way and smiled at him before continuing to a stool at the counter. He watched her as she walked. He was stricken with a vague sense of familiarity. Where has he seen her before? Maybe she was an actress working with Cas. A model? She certainly wasn’t from this town. But before Dean could finish his thought he was swallowed up by infinite blueness. His brained fizzled out a bit.

“Hello, Dean. It’s very good to see you.”

Dean swallowed thickly. He definitely was not prepared for this.

“Cas!” he spluttered, “Um… hey! Take a squat.”

Cas sat down in the seat Dean motioned to. He wore a black cargo pants and a forest green shirt that said “Kiss me I’m Irish”. Dean looked him over, licking his lips. The man was just as mouth watering as he remembered. 

“Dean? Are you alright?” Cas asked with a hint of a knowing smirk on his lips. The fucking asshat knew exactly what he was doing.

“You’re Irish?” Dean said the word warily. He most certainly didn’t get an Irish feel from Cas. Especially with the last name “Novak”.

“No… I just wanted to wear a shirt that made you think about kissing me.”

“And there it is…” Dean might’ve of missed the bastard, but that smart mouth was another story.

“I apologize…” the actor sighed “I’m actually really nervous right now. I know this is a serious conversation and I’ll proceed as such.”

Dean looked him over again. This time not with appraisal, but with trepidation. He was definitely going out on a limb here and all for the sake of a moment of insanity that made him fall for the man in front of him. Depending on the outcome of this conversation, things can go very wrong for him, but they can go very right as well. With a deep breath in and out he takes the bag from his lap and pushes it toward Castiel. Here goes nothing.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Castiel could practically feel Dean’s apprehension like it was a tangible thing. Despite his longing for the man, part of him was just insatiably curious to know what Michael must’ve shown him that caused such a fear in someone like Dean Winchester. When the bag was pushed to him on the table his heart grew heavy. What was in the bag? He needed to know. He took it gently as if it was a bomb he needed to be cautious with. Opening it, his breath caught in his throat.

_What the actual fuck?!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun dun duuuuuun! So... we still haven't found out what's in the bag. Don't you like the anticipation?! Will Castiel clear up this mistake or does the "evidence" actually stick? Is Cas the only one for Dean or is there a new player in town? Is this ending commentary really corny or just ridiculous? Tune in next time to find out!
> 
> Just wanted to send out continual "thank you"s to the people who leave comments and kudos, you all rock! Update on my life: I did well on my finals and I've started the summer semester. I'm going to try to write more, but we'll see how things pan out.


	16. The Revealing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. I honestly feel terrible. The chapter is even that long. My life has been kind of crazy... I've never had so many panic attacks in a semester before. Not the best summer for me. I'm happy I was able to get this chapter out for you guys. Sorry if things seem off or my writings more sucky than usual, I've been away from the story to long =/

“What the actual fuck?!” Cas hissed out the words that were ringing in his mind before he could stop himself. Reaching into the disorganized pile of photos, he pulled a few out to get a closer look. The horror grew more evident on his face as he looked at them closer. The pictures were him and… a woman. He recognized the setting. It was, for lack of better words, a sex dungeon. Crosses on the wall, sex swings and chains dangling from the ceiling, bondage tables, spanking benches, and a variety of other depraved trinkets. But the lewdness of the room was overshadowed by the acts that Castiel was performing with the woman. He was whipping her, stuffing her mouth with his cock, looking on as groups of men took her in every way possible, dragging her by her hair, even a close up of her face marred with his cum and her tears. Cas wanted to throw up. Where the hell had Michael gotten these? How the hell were pictures like these even taken without him noticing?

  
“Cas… you alright dude?” Cas abruptly brought his eyes to the green ones in front of him. No wonder the man’s been fucking terrified of him. Dean probably thought that he was a monster, an abuser, a rapist, a-

  
“Castiel.” He turned and saw Tina. She ushered him back down into his seat (when did he even stand up?). She quickly grabbed a chair from another table and sat next to him. He deflated immediately.

  
“Um…” Dean looked on with confusion. The whole situation seemed very unexpected for him.

  
“Hello, you must be Dean. My name is Tina, Castiel’s assistant.”

  
Tina and Dean exchanged pleasantries, while Castiel tried to regain his composure. It was as if a dam broke and all the emotions gushed out. It was finally hitting him that Michael had the power to destroy everything that Castiel labored for over the years. All the success that he gained, all the hurdles that his sister helped him get over, all of it crumbling to nothing but dust in the wind simply because Michael wanted it to happen.

  
He shoved the evidence into the bag and passed it to Tina. The godforsaken pack was burning a hole in his lap. He watched warily as the Puerto Rican woman drew a picture and immediately dropped it as if it stung her fingers.

  
“What the fuck?!” she seethed. Eyes snapping up to Castiel’s and him returning her with nothing more than a defeated shrug.

  
“I’m honestly super confused right now. Either of you going to explain what the fuck is going on?!”

  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

  
Dean was fed up. First Cas started having a panic attack or some shit when he saw the photos. Dean wasn’t expecting that. Threats? Yeah. Anger? Of course. Hell, he even thought about the possibility of getting kidnap. But a fucking panic attack? What the hell was up with that? What type of hardcore rapist chickened out like a wuss when someone gets a little dirt on them? Then, to make things even more confusing, the golden beauty from the door earlier just appeared at Cas’ side like she belonged there. Tina the assistant… more like Tina the fuckbuddy. She was a little bit too familiar with the guy. But Dean’s not jealous or anything. Well… no… he was definitely jealous. If his face had the ability to change colors, it would definitely turn green with envy. Then he just shared the pictures with her like nothing (which is definitely not something you just do with your assistant, at least not those photos). The whole thing was making his head hurt. None of it clicked or pieced together. None of it-

  
“No…” the realization was evident on his face. There was no way that- no… The more Dean stared at the couple the more he saw it. “You’re the girl.” The words came out not louder than a whisper.

  
Fierce grey eyes jumped to his. They seemed to pin him to his seat, fix him in place. “Where the hell did you get these?!”

  
“He got them from Michael.”

  
“And where the hell did HE get them? This is impossible!”

  
“That’s why you looked so familiar when I saw you walk in the door. You’re the girl!”

  
“Yes, Dean. We get it. I’m the girl. Let’s move on, hm? Do you understand what this could mean for Castiel and I?”

  
“Are you alright? Is he keeping you hostage? Blackmailing you?” Dean took the chance to just come out with it despite the presence of the bastard sitting across from him. If he was doing something to this girl then he wasn’t going to just sit on the sidelines and ignore it.

  
“What? No! Why would you think that?”

  
“Tina. The pictures obviously contain an element of abuse and dare I even say, an air on non-con?” Cas’ words came out as a tired sigh.

  
“We should discuss this somewhere else. Come on,” Tina grabbed the bag and Castiel’s hand, dragging him out of the diner. Dean found his legs following after them.  
She led them to a dark secluded place in the parking lot. It seemed very unlikely that anyone would hear them or see them. Dean obviously wasn’t thinking clearly. Didn’t his parents teach him not to go with suspicious people? And these two had a crap load of that going on with them.

  
“So, let’s just come out with it, hm? I’m a masochist. I take immense pleasure from pain play and degradation. I enjoy to role play as a helpless victim subject to the will of another. Everything in the picture was perfectly consensual and safe. Castiel is my dom and per my request he took on the persona of a ruthless, sadistic master because I ASKED HIM TOO. I am not helpless nor am I passive in real life and Castiel isn’t abusive nor cruel. Got it?” Despite the minimal lighting, Tina’s grey eyes were visible. There was a hard, unyielding glint in them as she talked. They seemed to challenge him to say something wrong so she could chew him out. She was right, Dean couldn’t see a submissive little flower before him. He saw a blunt strong woman who apparently didn’t take shit and someone who he could definitely get along with.

  
“I’m so sorry, Dean. This all must be very distressing for you. I had no idea that this was the burden you were carrying this whole time…”

  
Cas sounded so damn broken. Dean’s heart felt like it dropped to the pit of his stomach. This whole situation was fucked up for him, he couldn’t even fathom how devastating it is for Cas. His whole career would go down the drain is even one of these got out, let alone the video… That could put him in some seriously deep shi-

  
“Fuck!”

  
“Dean, what is it?!”

  
Dean looked over at Cas. His eyes were filled with worry over Dean’s outburst. “I um… I just remembered the video…”

  
“No fucking way. You’re lying,” Tina’s eyes narrowed. If looks could kill… Was all that Dean could think. Well, maybe not kill. More like if looks could strip the flesh off your bones and cast your soul to hell. Yeah… definitely more like that.

  
“Tina. Calm down. I understand the gravity of this situation just as much as you. If Michael somehow got all these pictures, I’d be surprised if there wasn’t a video.”

  
“I just can’t figure out how, though. We were so careful! I thought it would be alright… I fucked this up so much Castiel… I’m so sorry.”

  
The pair were holding each other tightly. Tina’s ferocity seemed to have melted away. Dean finally saw their relationship clearly, at least he thought he did. These were two people who’ve obviously been through some shit. Two people who’ve no doubt been to the end of their lines and instead of falling into the abyss resorted to using each other as life preservers. But now, it seemed like they were both drowning. Good thing they had an extra floater.

  
“Alright. This is what we’re going to do. We’re going to go back to my place and count the number of pictures, check for any repeats, and then burn the whole of it with the video thrown in. Hopefully you guys remember the other people involved in this thing because I need their names, first and last, and if you remember where they were living at the time would be really good and I should be able to find them. We make some calls, chat these people up, and see if we can tell whether or not Michael bought one of them out. We’re going need to brainstorm how to approach Michael as well in order to find out what he wants or why he dumped this crap on my lap.” Dean started walking to his car, ready to get into gear, down to the nitty gritty. When he turned around to say something else he saw Cas and Tina glued to their spots. “What the hell, guys? Let’s go. We have work to do and I have coffee to make. The sooner we get to my place the better.”

  
Tina was the first to defrost, a smirk widening on her face, “Oh… Dean. I like it when you get all bossy like that. It makes my lady parts warm and tingly.”

  
Cas barked out a sharp laugh. Gripping her hand tightly in his as he ran after Dean. Before Dean was able to get jealous about it, the couple caught up to him, the blue-eyed man immediately gliding his fingers between Dean’s. The three of them walked hand in hand to the Impala. This was definitely something that if Dean wasn’t careful, he could find himself getting use to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty lame ending, huh? Just want to say thank you to everyone who are kind enough to leave kudos and comments. They really boost my self esteem and make me feel so much better. Trust me when I say I need that sometimes. Anyway... don't be afraid to comment and all that jazz. I really do love hearing from you. Hopefully I can get another chapter out before the end of the year... haha! (I'm hope that joke stays a joke because I don't know how well my updates are going to go in the future O_O)


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